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It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance; for sports or music and others are not. However, it is sometimes clamined that any children can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.10

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance; for sports or music and others are not. However, it is sometimes clamined that any children can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. v. 10
One of the controversial issues today is whether some people have special talents by genetics or they can be taught to become good at anything such as sports and music. In this essay, I am going to examine both views and give my own opinion on the matter. On one side of the argument, there are people who believe that some individuals are born with a specific ability. That can be being good at football, playing a guitar, or drawing outstanding pictures. For example, if we look at a successful musician, it is often seen that their parents or other members of their family are musicians as well. This case is the most powerful reason why some people think talent is a heritage and it is inherited genetically. On the other hand, it is also possible for some people to believe that talents are shaped by training. Those people are mostly the ones who experienced building an ability from scratch. For instance, even if someone doesn't have a family member who played basketball, it is still possible for them to practice from an early age until they are good enough to be called as talented. Furthermore, it is common for parents to teach their kids what they are interested in themselves. Therefore, this might lead to a misunderstanding about being born with it or being taught. In conclusion, both arguments have their merits. However, I tend to believe that, with the needed amount of training, any children can be successful at what they like.
One of the controversial issues
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is whether
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have special talents by
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
genetics or
they can
be taught
to become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at anything such as sports and music. In this essay, I am going to examine both views and give my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinion on the matter.

On one side of the argument, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals
are born
with a specific ability. That can be being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at football, playing a guitar, or drawing outstanding pictures.
For example
, if we look at a successful musician, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that their parents or other members of their family are musicians
as well
. This case is the most powerful reason why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
talent is a heritage and it
is inherited
genetically
.

On the other hand
, it is
also
possible for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to believe that talents
are shaped
by training. Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
mostly
the ones who experienced building an ability from scratch.
For instance
, even if someone doesn't have a family member who played basketball, it is
still
possible for them to practice from an early age until they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
be called
as talented.
Furthermore
, it is common for parents to teach their kids what they
are interested
in themselves.
Therefore
, this might lead to a misunderstanding about
being born
with it or
being taught
.

In conclusion
, both arguments have their merits.
However
, I tend to believe that, with the needed amount of training, any children can be successful at what they like.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance; for sports or music and others are not. However, it is sometimes clamined that any children can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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