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It is commonly believed that in life, success is not the most important thing: it is more important to remain happy and optimistic when we fall. Do agree with that idea? v.1

It is commonly believed that in life, success is not the most important thing: it is more important to remain happy and optimistic when we fall. Do agree with that idea? v. 1
Students are currently able to acquire information on the internet in a much faster way than in the past. While I accept that online resources of information have advantages over traditional libraries, I would argue that there is still a great need for libraries in today’s world. It is true that accessing information online has several clear benefits. The first one is that online sources can store a lot more information than any physical library. This allows researchers to easily get information without travelling to a local library. Furthermore, students can look for information on the internet whenever they want, while most libraries can only be visited during certain hours of the day. As a result, finding information online is easier for people who are busy with their work during daytime. However, I believe that physical libraries still have special features that online sources can never have. The first one, of course, is the ambience. Libraries usually provide a quiet space for reading or learning. This will greatly benefit students who are learning or researching since they are less likely to be distracted by people or things around them. For example, many university students claim that they can only concentrate when they are in a quiet study area in their university library. Secondly, since everyone can easily write and post information on the internet, these online sources are not always reliable for research. Therefore, we need libraries whose staff members have the responsibility to select and provide readers with the most credible materials. In conclusion, while I agree that there are several benefits to getting information on the internet, I disagree with the idea that traditional libraries are no longer important.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
are
currently
able to acquire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on the internet in a much faster way than in the past. While I accept that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
resources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
have advantages over traditional libraries, I would argue that there is
still
a great need for libraries in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world.

It is true that accessing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
has several
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
benefits. The
first
one is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
sources can store a lot more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
than any physical library. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
researchers to
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
without travelling to a local library.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can look for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on the internet whenever they want, while most libraries can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be visited
during certain hours of the day.
As a result
, finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
is easier for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are busy with their work during daytime.

However
, I believe that physical libraries
still
have special features that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
sources can never have. The
first
one,
of course
, is the ambience. Libraries
usually
provide a quiet space for reading or learning. This will
greatly
benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who are learning or researching since they are less likely to
be distracted
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
or things around them.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
claim that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
concentrate when they are in a quiet study area in their university library.
Secondly
, since everyone can
easily
write and post
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on the internet, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
sources are not always reliable for research.
Therefore
, we need libraries whose staff members have the responsibility to select and provide readers with the most credible materials.

In conclusion
, while I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that there are several benefits to getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on the internet, I disagree with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that traditional libraries are no longer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay It is commonly believed that in life, success is not the most important thing: it is more important to remain happy and optimistic when we fall. Do agree with that idea? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
281 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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