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It is better to be happy than rich. Do you agree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.2

It is better to be happy than rich. Do you agree? v. 2
These days, it is arguable seen that being happy is the preferred choice of most people as compared to being rich. In my opinion, it is possible for people to feel happy even if they have little money, as other aspects of life can play a more vital role in creating happiness. It is undeniable that without financial stability, one could not think of happiness. This is because, the basic necessities are not met and each day people are struggling to make ends meet. As a result, they do not worry about being happy, as all they think of is financial security. With this, it is arguable that being rich is much more important than being happy. On the other hand, gaining happiness through work is believed to be one way to gain happiness. For example, a nurse doing volunteering work in undeveloped countries will not earn any money in return, but the reward of helping people and doing the job they are good at brings happiness in itself. Therefore, happiness can be found by using skills one is trained for and through job satisfaction. Besides that, having family support and loved ones in one’s life influences happiness. Although money can bring the receivers the opportunities to enjoy themselves, nothing beats being surrounded by a loving and caring family. In conclusion, being rich is not an essential key to happiness as it can be found through job satisfaction as well as family. If more people work hard in life to achieve happiness rather than pursuing being rich, it would make the world a better place to live in as happiness is a very important emotion and everyone in life feels it.
These days, it is arguable
seen
that being happy is the preferred choice of most
people
as compared to being
rich
. In my opinion, it is possible for
people
to feel happy even if they have
little
money, as other aspects of
life
can play a more vital role in creating happiness.

It is undeniable that without financial stability, one could not
think
of
happiness
. This is
because
, the
basic necessities
are not met and each day
people
are struggling to
make
ends
meet
.
As a result
, they do not worry about being happy, as all they
think
of is financial security. With this, it is arguable that being
rich
is much more
important
than being happy.

On the other hand
, gaining
happiness
through work
is believed
to be one way to gain
happiness
.
For example
, a nurse doing volunteering work in undeveloped countries will not earn any money in return,
but
the reward of helping
people
and doing the job they are
good
at brings
happiness
in itself.
Therefore
,
happiness
can
be found
by using
skills
one
is trained
for and through job satisfaction.
Besides
that, having family support and
loved
ones
in one’s
life
influences
happiness
. Although money can bring the receivers the opportunities to enjoy themselves, nothing beats
being surrounded
by a loving and caring family.

In conclusion
, being
rich
is not an essential key to
happiness
as it can
be found
through job satisfaction
as well
as family. If more
people
work
hard
in
life
to achieve
happiness
rather
than pursuing being
rich
, it would
make
the world a better place to
live
in as
happiness
is a
very
important
emotion and everyone in
life
feels it.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay It is better to be happy than rich. Do you agree? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
281 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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