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It is better for the students to live away from the home during their university studies rather than staying with their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People may have contrasting views on whether it is good for students to stay with their parents or not during university studies with some arguing that it is better to stay in hostel accommodation. While is is agreed that staying with parents have some advantages, in my opinion, students should stay away from parents in order to get some valuable exposure. Admittedly, there is no denying that staying with parents during studies has some benefits. For instance, it would be more economical for students to stay with their parents. Since there is extra expense for food and accommodation when staying in hostel, it would not be affordable to everyone, especially, those who come from weak financial background. Yet another point is that, parents can always have a watch over their children. As a result, they will not develop any undesirable friendship or habits. However, there are many compelling reasons why I believe that students should stay on their own. Firstly, students will become self-reliant and confident individuals. This is due to the fact that while living alone, they learn to manage their personal matter on their own and take decisions without the help of parents. Obiviously, this wouldn't be possible when staying with parents who are over-protective. Secondly, students will get exposure to outside world since they will be staying and mingling with individuals coming from different backgrounds. Therfore, people management skills of students would improve and will help them become well-rounded individuals. To sum up, even though staying with parents have its own benefits, I would agree with the idea of staying away from them during tertiary education.
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People
may have contrasting views on whether it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stay
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
or not during university studies with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
arguing that it is better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stay
in hostel accommodation. While
Possible typo: you repeated a word
is is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages, in my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stay
away from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
valuable exposure.
Admittedly
, there is no denying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
during studies has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits.
For instance
, it would be more economical for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stay
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. Since there is extra expense for food and accommodation when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
in hostel, it would not be affordable to everyone,
especially
, those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from weak financial background.
Yet
another point is that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
can always have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
over their children.
As a result
, they will not develop any undesirable friendship or habits.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
compelling reasons why I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stay
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will become self-reliant and confident individuals.
This is due to the fact that
while living alone, they learn to manage their personal matter on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
and take decisions without the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Obiviously
, this wouldn't be possible when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
who are over-protective.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
exposure to outside world since they will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
and mingling with individuals coming from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
backgrounds.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Therfore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
management
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them become well-rounded individuals. To sum up,
even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
away from them during tertiary education.
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IELTS essay It is better for the students to live away from the home during their university studies rather than staying with their parents.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
269 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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