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It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. Discuss the benefits of this development and problems associated with it. v.9

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. Discuss the benefits of this development and problems associated with it. v. 9
A growing number of school-leavers tends to take a gap before starting a university. Some adolescents find the chance to take their minds off studying for a year as an attractive option while others are more sceptical about this possibility. One of the major positives of taking a year off is that it can bestow a young person some additional time for better self-exploration and finding the most appropriate career path, as a result. Thus, young people who try themselves in working or volunteering in various spheres can benefit from acquiring a better understanding of their own aptitudes, areas of growth and their position in society, taking which into account will definitely facilitate choosing the right future direction. Secondly, not going to university right after high school can reduce the youngsters' off-scale anxiety levels caused by countless school tests and exams. In order to restore their inner and outer balance, young people can travel to new places, engage in enjoyable hobbies, practice meditation and mindfulness. Turning to the other side of the argument, becoming too nonchalant after a long hiatus can lead to reluctance to continue perform academic duties any further at all. It is apparent that returning to the studying routine after a year's break can be disquieting for any individual, since the need for refreshing voluminous academic knowledge and restoring some crucial learning skills might sound overwhelming and even discouraging. Another issue is that this one-year period can affect a family budget in a detrimental way and even turn out futile since even though young people eventually go to work, they can rarely obtain highly-paid jobs instantly due to lack of proper education, which may result in parents’ being bound to continue covering their offspring's growing needs and expenses for a protracted period of time. All things considered, in some cases having a rather lengthy interval between school graduation and university studies can contribute to lack of interest for further studying and have a deleterious impact on the family finances. On the other hand, owing to this decision, not only can young people benefit from real-life experiences and choose better career paths, but also recharge their minds and hearts for new achievements.
A growing number of school-leavers tends to take a gap
before
starting a university.
Some
adolescents find the chance to take their minds off studying for a year as an attractive option while others are more
sceptical
about this possibility.

One of the major positives of taking a year off is that it can bestow a
young
person
some
additional time for better self-exploration and finding the most appropriate career path,
as a result
.
Thus
,
young
people
who try themselves in working or volunteering in various spheres can benefit from acquiring a better understanding of their
own
aptitudes, areas of growth and their position in society, taking which into account will definitely facilitate choosing the right future direction.

Secondly
, not going to university right after high school can
reduce
the youngsters' off-scale anxiety levels caused by countless school
tests
and exams. In order to restore their inner and outer balance,
young
people
can travel to new places, engage in enjoyable hobbies, practice meditation and mindfulness.

Turning to the other side of the argument, becoming too nonchalant after a long hiatus can lead to reluctance to
continue perform
academic duties any
further
at all. It is apparent that returning to the studying routine after a year's break can be disquieting for any individual, since the need for refreshing voluminous academic knowledge and restoring
some
crucial learning
skills
might sound overwhelming and even discouraging.

Another issue is that this one-year period can affect a family budget
in a detrimental way
and even turn out futile since
even though
young
people
eventually
go to work, they can rarely obtain
highly
-paid jobs
instantly
due to lack of proper education, which may result in parents’
being bound
to continue covering their offspring's growing needs and expenses for a protracted period of time.

All things considered, in
some
cases having a
rather
lengthy interval between school graduation and university studies can contribute to lack of interest for
further
studying and have a deleterious impact on the family finances.
On the other hand
, owing to this decision, not
only
can
young
people
benefit from real-life experiences and choose better career paths,
but
also
recharge their minds and hearts for new achievements.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. Discuss the benefits of this development and problems associated with it. v. 9

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
364 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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