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It has been becoming increasingly common for fathers to take off some amount of time after being a father. In my opinion, it has economic ramifications, it is a positive medium that should be encouraged.

It has been becoming increasingly common for fathers to take off some amount of time after being a father. In my opinion, it has economic ramifications, it is a positive medium that should be encouraged. yxg8J
It has been becoming increasingly common for fathers to take off some amount of time after being a father. In my opinion, it has economic ramifications, it is a positive medium that should be encouraged. Critics agree that overall, the implications are negative for the economy.  Most companies have already taken into account maternity leave in their yearly budget. Should fathers take off extra time to take care of their children, some companies may struggle to pay for some money or compete to gain profits. Furthermore, in business both small and big companies employers would not allocate wages to help their workers, the result might affect the family’s condition. It means that less money for consumers and parents who need additional means to provide for their children. Nonetheless, this change seems to be positive in gender equality. In history, there was a big difference between men and women related to institutionalized hierarchy. Moreover, in the last centuries, equal treatment affected primarily women, but it should be fair in order not to discriminate gender. Giving time-off for fathers from their staff could indeed help their women to become equal in that situation. In addition, the majority of men do not need to elongate the priority of caring, it should be shorter but remain significant. In conclusion, despite the economic tradeoff, most men should be given paternity leave to be with a newborn child. Having said that negatives can be lessened if the time is limited relative to maternity leave.
It has been becoming
increasingly
common for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fathers
to take off
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
amount of time after being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
. In my opinion, it has economic ramifications, it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
medium that should
be encouraged
.

Critics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
overall
, the implications are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
for the economy.  Most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
have already taken into account maternity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
in their yearly budget. Should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fathers
take off extra time to take care of their children,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
may struggle to pay for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money or compete to gain profits.
Furthermore
, in business both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
employers would not allocate wages to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their workers, the result might affect the family’s condition. It means that less money for consumers and parents who need additional means to provide for their children.

Nonetheless, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
seems to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
in gender equality. In history, there was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
difference between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women related to institutionalized hierarchy.
Moreover
, in the last centuries, equal treatment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
primarily
women,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
in order not to discriminate gender. Giving time-off for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fathers
from their staff could
indeed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their women to become equal in that situation.
In addition
, the majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
do not need to elongate the priority of caring, it should be shorter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
remain significant.

In conclusion
, despite the economic
Possible spelling mistake found.
tradeoff
, most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
paternity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
to be with a newborn child. Having said that negatives can
be lessened
if the time
is limited
relative to maternity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
.

IELTS essay It has been becoming increasingly common for fathers to take off some amount of time after being a father. In my opinion, it has economic ramifications, it is a positive medium that should be encouraged.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
248 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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