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Is the mental strength important for success in sports or is it more important to have strong and fit people in sports. Discuss both views and give opinion. v.2

Some people claim that mental strength plays the most crucial role in success in sports meanwhile the others consider strong and fit people are more essential. In this essay, I will discuss benefits from both of aspects and give personal point of view that mental strength is the main factor. To begin with, it is clear that strong and fit people are highly necessary for sports. Strong athletes have physical health dominating. They are usually faster and more enduring, which can help them to get the high percentage of victory. Besides, good physical health is stable without much unexpected influence from surroundings. With the best health care, therefore, it can reduce risk of failing as well as injuries because of athletes ‘health conditions. Moreover, it spends less money and time on promoting physical strength. Instead, their managers invest more time and money to enhance their skill. On the other hand, mental strength virtually brings success in sports for some following reasons. First and foremost, mental strength originates in competition. Sports are a safe form of competition which is a natural instinct in humans. Thanks to increase in mental strength, athletes make effort to practice more and overcome hardships, and then they strive to get the highest rank in sport match. More importantly, for sport team as football, volleyball, solidarity which a remarkable kind of mental strength, creates great power for all teammates. In some special cases, mental strength could also create a “big bang” which only happened when an underrated team makes miracle. For instance, Vietnamese football team had made it in final round of U23 Asia football cup. With above-mentioned strengthens, it is clear that mental strength factor outweighs strong physical health. In conclusion, although having strong and fit people can bring victory in sports, it is more important that mental health should be considered as a main factor for success in sports.
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Some
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people
claim that
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mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
plays the most crucial role in success in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
meanwhile the others consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strong
and fit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more essential. In this essay, I will discuss benefits from both of aspects and give personal point of view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
is the main factor.

To
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begin
with, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
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strong
and fit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
highly
necessary for
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sports
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Strong
athletes have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
dominating. They are
usually
faster and more enduring, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the high percentage of victory.
Besides
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
is stable without much unexpected influence from surroundings. With the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care,
therefore
, it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of failing
as well
as injuries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of athletes
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‘health
conditions.
Moreover
, it spends less money and time on promoting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
.
Instead
, their managers invest more time and money to enhance their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.

On the other hand
,
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mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
virtually
brings success in
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sports
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
following reasons.
First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
originates in competition.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
are a safe form of competition which is a natural instinct in humans. Thanks to increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
, athletes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
effort to practice more and overcome hardships, and then they strive to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the highest rank in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
match. More
importantly
, for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
team as football, volleyball, solidarity which a remarkable kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
, creates great power for all teammates. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
special cases,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
could
also
create a “
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
bang” which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
happened when an underrated team
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
miracle.
For instance
, Vietnamese football team had made it in final round of U23 Asia football cup. With above-mentioned strengthens, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
factor outweighs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
health.

In conclusion
, although having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strong
and fit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can bring victory in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, it is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
should
be considered
as a main factor for success in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that mental strength is the most important factor for success in sports. However, some others believe that it is more important to have strong and fit people.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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