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Is the advertising effective or not?

Is the advertising effective or not? oRMJV
I agree with the idea that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy something for the following reasons. For one thing, people who make advertisings give us a lot of information that makes us desire to buy something. For example, when company make advertisings of products of oral care, they often use models who look clean. I think this is because people who see this advertising tend to long to be them and try those products. Also, food on advertising looks better than reality. Company which makes advertising make efforts so that more and more people buy their products. For another, some sellers use AI especially on the Internet to search the best products for customers. We can see this instance when we do Internet shopping. Once we buy something on the Internet, AI suggests the next best products for us by searching and analyzing the personal history. I think this system is very effective to making us buy something. It is true that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention. We see a lot of advertisings in our daily life such as commercials on TV, newspaper and signs in the street. We don’t pay attention for all of them because we have different interests. Nevertheless, I think advertising has a big power to persuade us to buy something. I heard the news that the influence of advertising is great in today’s shopping business. For these reasons, I agree with the idea that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy something.
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that advertising is
extremely
successful at persuading us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
for the following reasons. For one thing,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
Possible spelling mistake found.
advertisings
give us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
information that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
us desire to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
.
For example
, when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
Possible spelling mistake found.
advertisings
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
of oral care, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
models who look clean. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
this advertising tend to long to be them and try those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
Also
, food on advertising looks better than reality.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Company
which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
advertising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
efforts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. For another,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sellers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
AI
especially
on the Internet to search the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
for customers. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
this instance when we do Internet shopping. Once we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
on the Internet, AI suggests the
next
best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
for us by searching and analyzing the personal history. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this system is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
effective to making us
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
something.

It is true that advertising is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
common that we no longer pay attention. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
Possible spelling mistake found.
advertisings
in our daily life such as commercials on TV, newspaper and signs in the street. We don’t pay attention for all of them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
interests.

Nevertheless
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
advertising has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
power to persuade us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
. I heard the news that the influence of advertising is great in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s shopping business. For these reasons, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that advertising is
extremely
successful at persuading us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
.
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IELTS essay Is the advertising effective or not?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
258 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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