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Is punishing children for their mistakes correct? Do you agreee or not?

Is punishing children for their mistakes correct? Do you agreee or not? 95BW7
It is our duty to teach children from childhood to consider the diversity between right and wrong. Repression is vital to help them know this difference. I disagree this idea. I do not think so. Parents should be friend with their child. They should explain everything calmly. It is not necessary to explain the difference between good and bad by punishing. If we castigate a child instead of teaching it a kind way he or she may intentionally do the same thing again. When folks teach them to live rudely, children may hate them. As a result, the child will not have a good relationship with their parent. We can also use simple punishments to teach our children the difference of right and wrong. For example, depriving them of their go-to things for a while. Another sort of punishment is prohibiting him or her to go out. Child should stay alone to think and figure out. If a problem is with their telephone, we should take it. As the coin has two sides, mobile phone or internet has bad and good sides. If child get used to surfing net all day, she or he may also give up studying. So the child will become an indifferent person in the future. As far as I am concerned, child rearing is a so delicate thing. Parents should be watchful for their each action. To sum up, we use simple and exemplary punishments for children. Unless you are not responsible person, your child will not be good person in the future.
It is our duty to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
from childhood to consider the diversity between right and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. Repression is vital to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them know this difference.

I disagree this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
. I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
. Parents should be
Did you mean "friended"?
friend
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
. They should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
everything
calmly
. It is not necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the difference between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
by punishing. If we castigate a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
instead
of teaching it a kind way he or she may
intentionally
do the same thing again. When folks teach them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
rudely
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
may hate them.
As a result
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
will not have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
relationship with their parent.

We can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
simple punishments to teach our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
the difference of right and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
.
For example
, depriving them of their go-to things for a while. Another sort of punishment is prohibiting him or her to go out.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Child
should stay alone to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
and figure out. If a problem is with their telephone, we should take it. As the coin has two sides, mobile phone or internet has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
sides. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to surfing net all day, she or he may
also
give up studying.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
will become an indifferent person in the future.

As far as I
am concerned
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
rearing is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
delicate thing. Parents should be watchful for their each action. To sum up, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
simple and exemplary punishments for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Unless you are not responsible person, your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
will not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
person in the future.
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IELTS essay Is punishing children for their mistakes correct? Do you agreee or not?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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