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Is disadvantages of technology are more than advantages?

Is disadvantages of technology are more than advantages? BYbGd
Science is a logical application with hypothetical statement in which different experiments are conducted and these inferences lead to new researches, discoveries and innovation. Moreover, technology makes the life comfortable and work become errorless. Overall, it saves time as well as energy. According to my perception the advantages of technology are many more than its disadvantages and this essay will highlights the reasons for my viewpoint in subsequent paragraphs. It makes the country progressive economically, socially and politically. Socially advancements are blessing as it makes the world global village. Heterogeneous culture develops by interacting with different segments of the society. Fast internet services, different digital applications developing international relations. To elaborate, due to development of apps such as whatsapp, Facebook and Instagram people can talk with their kith and kins easily by remaining in any corner of the world. Furthermore, technology develops industrialization which leads to modernization as well as global job opportunities this in turn increases per capita income of the society and people enjoy good economic status. Last but not the least, technology always has impact on political policies. Tourism increases as people are attracted to a place that is developed, advance with latest technology. Thus, tourism also benefits the country as it is one of the biggest industry. Every coin has two sides likewise there are some drawbacks of technology. First and foremost point is that cyber crime is increasing on social media accounts. Sometimes the personal information leakes in the society which interferes with the privacy of the user. Secondly, few scholars waste their time by using these gadgets for playing a games, listening a music and on social media. For instance, a survey conducted by the United State census bureau in 2014 revealed that majority of pupil use the technolgy for fun and frolic purposes, they do not like to use it to gain a knowledge. To recapitulate, both the viewpoints sound good but the former point is dominant over latter because advantages of technology are many more. Technology has no disadvantages. It is only the misuse of technology which causes the problems
Science is a logical application with hypothetical statement in which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
experiments
are conducted
and these inferences lead to new researches, discoveries and innovation.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the life comfortable and work become errorless.
Overall
, it saves time
as well
as energy. According to my perception the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more than its disadvantages and this essay will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "highlight"
highlights
the reasons for my viewpoint in subsequent paragraphs. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the country progressive
economically
,
socially
and
politically
.
Socially
advancements are blessing as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the world global village. Heterogeneous culture develops by interacting with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
segments of the society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Fast
internet services,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
digital applications developing international relations. To elaborate, due to development of apps such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
whatsapp
, Facebook and Instagram
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can talk with their kith and
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "kin", the plural form of the noun 'kin'?
kins
easily
by remaining in any corner of the world.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
develops industrialization which leads to modernization
as well
as global job opportunities this in turn increases per capita income of the society and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
enjoy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
economic status. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
always has impact on political policies. Tourism increases as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are attracted
to a place that
is developed
, advance with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
Thus
, tourism
also
benefits the country as it is one of the biggest industry. Every coin has two sides
likewise
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
First
and foremost point is that cyber crime is increasing on social media accounts.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
the personal information
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "leaks", the plural form of the noun 'leak'?
leakes
in the society which interferes with the privacy of the user.
Secondly
, few scholars waste their time by using these gadgets for playing
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a game" or simply "games"?
a games
, listening a music and on social media.
For instance
, a survey conducted by the United State census bureau in 2014 revealed that majority of pupil
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
technolgy
for fun and frolic purposes, they do not like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it to gain
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "knowledge".
a knowledge
. To recapitulate, both the viewpoints sound
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the former point is dominant over latter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
has no disadvantages. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the misuse of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
which causes the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
problems
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IELTS essay Is disadvantages of technology are more than advantages?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
347 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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