Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Effects of gambling on families. Discuss this point of view and give your opinion.

Effects of gambling on families. Discuss this point of view and give your opinion. VELkO
Today's humans are becoming more greedy and in order to earn more they try to follow short cuts to get more money like money gambling. And some people become addictive to this things and many families suffer because of this. I believe that many aspects contribute to this behaviour of human. To begin with le us try to see what are the sources of money gambling. For example lotteries, bingo, cricket match, horse betting. Numerous individual tend to play this games to be more rich. This games are not promising and can leads to major amount of money loss. Also when person become obsessive to certain kind of this games it can lead to money other problems. For instance if person go through some money loss that person is likely to go the depression and start doing smoking, drinking or even drugs, which results in bad health of person. Also when someone start getting money by no or less hard work they stop believe in hardwork. Secondly, When someone become rich by this illegal techniques they feel they can do anything and also they start cheat on their partners. In some cases if person is in depression of this money stealing they tend to become violent person. If they start to think that they want to earn more money by any cost they even do crimes. And if father of some child get arrested for any crime that child's mental health will be ruin. I believe that today's world is all about money. Society judge people by their money and give respect to those only who live luxurious life. That is the reason people start using this nonethical money making sources. This leads to nervous breakdown in both the person who is doing this and person's family also cant escape from this. To put it into not shell the main reason for gambling is one's greediness. And it leads to many problems like health hazard, crimes, mental harm.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
's humans are becoming more greedy and in order to earn more they try to follow short
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cuts
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
gambling. And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
addictive to
Did you mean "these"?
this
things and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
families suffer
because of this
. I believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects contribute to this
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of human.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with
Possible spelling mistake found.
le
us try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
what are the sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
gambling.
For example
lotteries, bingo, cricket match, horse betting. Numerous individual tend to play this games to be more rich.
Did you mean "these"?
This
games are not promising and can
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "lead"
leads
to major amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
loss.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
obsessive to certain kind of
Did you mean "these"?
this
games it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
other problems.
For instance
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
go through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
loss that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is likely to go the depression and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "going smoking".
doing smoking
, drinking or even drugs, which results in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
health of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
when someone
The pronoun 'someone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "starts", "started".
start
getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
by
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
or less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
believe in
Possible spelling mistake found.
hardwork
.

Secondly
, When someone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
rich by this illegal techniques they feel they can do anything and
also
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
cheat on their partners. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is in depression of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
stealing they tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they want to earn more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
by any cost they even do crimes. And if father of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "children"?
child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
arrested for any crime that child's mental health will be ruin.

I believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world is all about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. Society judge
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and give respect to those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
luxurious life.
That is
the reason
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
using this
Possible spelling mistake found.
nonethical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
making sources. This leads to nervous breakdown in both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
who is doing this and person's family
also
Did you mean "can't" or "cannot"?
cant
escape from this.

To put it into not shell the main reason for gambling is one's greediness. And it leads to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems like health hazard, crimes, mental harm.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Effects of gambling on families. Discuss this point of view and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
328 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts