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What are causes and negative effects of watching to much Tv?

What are causes and negative effects of watching to much Tv? K0pw3
Nowadays, it is undeniable that television plays an unchangeable role in daily life, so people tend to watch more Tv although several demerits. I consider this is mainly because of the addictive high-tech devices and carelessness from parents for infants, but there are several problems. As time passes by the mainstreams change, crowd excels the usage of television rather than outdoor activities. As a result, habit-forming people stay at home and prefer to observe Tv the majority part of the day. Another reason that brings watching much Tv is plenty of parents who have the newborn child open some cartoons on Tv in order for satisfying kids. When their babies begin to cry, mothers think that convenient way is Tv in order to get calmness. There are a number of issues that not keeping balance can bring on us. One of those is watching Tv, particularly from near, can cause diseases such as weak eyesight, obesity. To illustrate, because of the excessive amount of time spent on Tv, most of the humans these days are wearing glasses due to it destroys power of seeing. In addition, while people seat to watch Tv at home, day by day this situation may consequent with obesity owing to without physical movements. Another problem is that children copy the behavior they see on the screen and occasionally, especially teenagers link violence on television with crime rates in the real world. Taking everything into account, the two causes associated with too much TV watching: the nation is preferring those devices, and parent’s inattention that resulted from this trend. However, these will mainly be concluded with health discomfort and juveniles’ unsuitable behaviour.
Nowadays, it is undeniable that television plays an unchangeable role in daily life,
so
people
tend to
watch
more
Tv
although several demerits. I consider this is
mainly
because
of the addictive high-tech devices and carelessness from parents for infants,
but
there are several problems.

As time passes by the mainstreams
change
, crowd excels the usage of television
rather
than outdoor activities.
As a result
, habit-forming
people
stay at home and prefer to observe
Tv
the majority part of the day. Another reason that brings watching much
Tv
is
plenty
of parents who have the newborn child open
some
cartoons on
Tv
in order for satisfying kids. When their babies
begin
to cry, mothers
think
that convenient way is
Tv
in order to
get
calmness.

There are a number of issues that not keeping balance can bring on us. One of those is watching
Tv
,
particularly
from near, can cause diseases such as weak eyesight, obesity. To illustrate,
because
of the excessive amount of time spent on
Tv
, most of the humans these days are wearing glasses due to it
destroys
power of seeing.
In addition
, while
people
seat to
watch
Tv
at home, day by day this situation may consequent with obesity owing to without physical movements. Another problem is that children copy the behavior they
see
on the screen and
occasionally
,
especially
teenagers
link violence on television with crime rates in the real world.

Taking everything into account, the two causes associated with too much TV watching: the nation
is preferring
those devices, and parent’s inattention that resulted from this trend.
However
, these will
mainly
be concluded
with health discomfort and juveniles’ unsuitable
behaviour
.
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IELTS essay What are causes and negative effects of watching to much Tv?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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