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Inventors Are Not As Important To Society As Doctors

Inventors Are Not As Important To Society As Doctors gApx3
Inventors create new things that improve our lives whereas doctors save lives. Some people argue that inventors are of less importance than doctors. I do not agree with you as both of them play an equally important role in the well-being of the society. Without inventors we will not have most of the amenities that we take for granted today. From fire to electricity and wheels to aeroplanes, all the essentials and amenities that we enjoy today are the contributions of inventors. If these things had not been invented, we would still be living in caves hunting animals with stone tools. So, obviously, for whatever progress that we have achieved so far, the credit goes to inventors. On the other hand, doctors are important too as they save precious lives. Without health care, it is not possible to live a long and fulfilling life. People who do not live long cannot achieve much in life. Everyone falls ill from time to time and if there were no doctors, it would be difficult for people to live a long life. Now that medical science has developed a lot, it is common for people to live well into their 80’s and 90’s and this would not have been possible without the hard work and dedication of doctors. After analysing the situation, it is not hard to see that both doctors and inventors play equally important but distinctly different roles in our lives. Like everyone else, inventors depend on doctors for healthcare. Similarly, doctors take advantage of a lot of inventions to offer effective treatments to their patients. Hence, in my opinion, both are indispensable and it is not possible to say that one is more important than the other.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Inventors
create new things that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
inventors
are of less importance than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
. I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with you as both of them play an
equally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
role in the well-being of the society.

Without
The comma is probably missing here: "inventors, we".
inventors we
will not have most of the amenities that we take for granted
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. From fire to electricity and wheels to
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplanes' is British English.
aeroplanes
, all the essentials and amenities that we enjoy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
are the contributions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
inventors
. If these things had not
been invented
, we would
still
be living in caves hunting animals with stone tools.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
obviously
, for whatever progress that we have achieved
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
far, the credit goes to inventors.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
too as they save precious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. Without health care, it is not possible to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
a long and fulfilling life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
long cannot achieve much in life. Everyone falls ill from time to time and if there were no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
, it would be difficult for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
a long life.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
that medical science has developed a lot, it is common for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
well into their
Apostrophes aren't needed for decades: "80s".
80’s
and
Apostrophes aren't needed for decades: "90s".
90’s
and this would not have been possible without the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and dedication of doctors.

After
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
the situation, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
inventors
play
equally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
distinctly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
roles in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. Like everyone else,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
inventors
depend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
for healthcare.
Similarly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
take advantage of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
inventions to offer effective treatments to their patients.
Hence
, in my opinion, both are indispensable and it is not possible to say that one is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
than the other.
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IELTS essay Inventors Are Not As Important To Society As Doctors

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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