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International travel is becoming coming cheaper and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourist

International travel is becoming coming cheaper and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourist D026
International travel is becoming cheaper and more countries are opening their doors to increase the number of tourists. Do the advantages of increased tourism outweigh the disadvantages. In this new era of civilization, there is an increase in the number of nations that now open their entrance to many tourists as international travel has become cheaper. In my opinion, despite the benefits of job opportunities as well as an increase in the economic growth from the rise in the number of tourists, the drawbacks of this are greater than them. Admittedly, having growing tourism has some advantages. Firstly, opportunities in employment occur when nations doors are opened to visitors due to the rise in the need for human labour to meet up with the demands of efficiently running the tourist centres. This will result in a rapid and an eventual boost of the standard of living of the citizens. Moreover, there would also be a drastic growth in the economy of such a country. This is because huge resources received from the payment of taxes and other means of generating funds would raise enough revenue for the government. Nevertheless, there are several demerits of growing tourism that are detrimental, both to the environment and people living there. To begin with, an increase in pollution which occurs from the frequent use of cars to commute tourists in and out of the country is the main problem of this growth. In other words, there is an emission of carbon dioxide from the automobiles, thereby leading to the rising sea level. This could lead to serious disasters, especially flood which could lead to loss of properties and death of many innocent lives. Another drawback is the loss of morals, which is common amongst the citizens owing to the wrongful exposure to visitors, who are tourists. As a result, the ethics of such a nation would be lost. In conclusion, although there are many merits of opening countries doors to improve tourism, the demerits of the threat of global warming from air pollution and loss of morals cannot be overlooked as these could be dangerous to both the population and the nation safety.
International travel is becoming cheaper and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are opening their doors to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
. Do the advantages of increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
outweigh the disadvantages.

In this new era of civilization, there is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
open their entrance to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
as international travel has become cheaper. In my opinion, despite the benefits of job opportunities
as well
as an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in the economic growth from the rise in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
, the drawbacks of this are greater than
In formal / written English, it is recommended that you use a subject pronoun.
them
.

Admittedly
, having growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages.
Firstly
, opportunities in employment occur when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
doors
are opened
to visitors due to the rise in the need for human
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
up with the demands of
efficiently
running the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
. This will result in a rapid and an eventual boost of the standard of living of the citizens.
Moreover
, there would
also
be a drastic growth in the economy of such a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
huge resources received from the payment of taxes and other means of generating funds would raise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
revenue for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

Nevertheless
, there are several demerits of growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
that are detrimental, both to the environment and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living there. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in pollution which occurs from the frequent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of cars to commute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
in and out of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is the main problem of this growth.
In other words
, there is an emission of carbon dioxide from the automobiles, thereby leading to the rising sea level. This could lead to serious disasters,
especially
flood which could lead to loss of properties and death of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
innocent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Another drawback is the loss of morals, which is common amongst the citizens owing to the wrongful exposure to visitors, who are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
.
As a result
, the ethics of such a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
would
be lost
.

In conclusion
, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
merits of opening
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
doors to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
, the demerits of the threat of global warming from air pollution and loss of morals cannot
be overlooked
as these could be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
to both the population and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
safety.
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IELTS essay International travel is becoming coming cheaper and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourist

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
359 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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