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International travel is becoming cheaper and cheaper, and several countries are opening their doors. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

International travel is becoming cheaper and cheaper, and several countries are opening their doors. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
It is easier than ever to travel all around the world, thanks to the development of transportation technology and the process of globalization. As a result, many countries are opening their doors to welcome tourists, and in my opinion, this trend brings more benefits than drawbacks. On the one hand, several problems can be anticipated with the increased influx of international tourists. Firstly, without strict regulations, damage to the local culture seems unavoidable. Foreign visitors are often unaware of local customs and habits; as a consequence, some of their actions might be against the social norms and cause disrespect to the indigenous inhabitants. Locals, in order to earn more money, will also invite outsiders into their once sacred rituals and ceremonies, which is particularly harmful to the destination’s way of life. Secondly, there is a risk of increased social issues, such as prostitution, human trafficking and gambling, due to the rising number of tourist activities. Finally, the development of international travel will also lead to several environmental problems. That being said, the positive impacts of tourism are undeniable to both tourists and the host country. For travellers, they have a chance to broaden their horizon, absorb new knowledge which is unavailable in their homeland, and make new friends. For the destination community, the increased number of foreign tourists often translates into more revenues for the national economy, as related services such as hospitality and entertainment are allowed to thrive, creating more jobs and contributing a significant amount to the country’s GDP. In addition, this is an opportunity for a nation to introduce its cultural values and identity to the world, and cultural diversity can also be improved as foreign visitors often bring with them a whole new lifestyle and perspective. All things considered, I strongly believe that we gain more than we lose from the development of international travel.
It is easier than ever to travel all around the world, thanks to the development of transportation technology and the process of globalization.
As a result
,
many
countries are opening their doors to welcome
tourists
, and in my opinion, this trend brings more benefits than drawbacks.

On the one hand, several problems can
be anticipated
with the increased influx of international
tourists
.
Firstly
, without strict regulations, damage to the local culture seems unavoidable. Foreign visitors are
often
unaware of local customs and habits; as a consequence,
some
of their actions might be against the social norms and cause disrespect to the indigenous inhabitants. Locals, in order to earn more money, will
also
invite outsiders into their once sacred rituals and ceremonies, which is
particularly
harmful to the destination’s way of life.
Secondly
, there is a
risk
of increased social issues, such as prostitution, human trafficking and gambling, due to the rising number of
tourist
activities.
Finally
, the development of international travel will
also
lead to several environmental problems.

That
being said
, the
positive
impacts of tourism are undeniable to both
tourists
and the host country. For
travellers
, they have a chance to broaden their horizon, absorb new knowledge which is unavailable in their homeland, and
make
new friends. For the destination community, the increased number of foreign
tourists
often
translates into more revenues for the national economy, as related services such as hospitality and entertainment are
allowed
to thrive, creating more jobs and contributing a significant amount to the country’s GDP.
In addition
, this is an opportunity for a nation to introduce its cultural values and identity to the world, and cultural diversity can
also
be
improved
as foreign visitors
often
bring with them a whole new lifestyle and perspective.

All things considered, I
strongly
believe that we gain more than we lose from the development of international travel.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay International travel is becoming cheaper and cheaper, and several countries are opening their doors. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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