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International travel has become more affordable and many countries are opening their doors to increase the number of tourists What are the advantages and disadvantages of this v.2

International travel has become more affordable and many countries are opening their doors to increase the number of tourists What are the advantages and disadvantages of this v. 2
Numerous nations are willing to welcome foreign tourists due to the affordability of travel abroad. This essay will suggest that creating job opportunities for the indigenous is the biggest advantage of this and contamination is the primary disadvantage. Initially, the increase in number of tourists brings about financial benefits for local persons. These individuals are capable of raising their income thanks to selling souvenirs, specialties or being tour-guides. , helping them ameliorate family condition as well as cover living costs. Moreover, tourism companies or travel agencies have a tendency to employ indigenous dwellers because of their knowledge of local tradition and geography. By the way of illustration, the flourish of tourism help people living in Hawaii increase their monthly income remarkably and improve the education background of local children. Despite these advantages, the development of tourism also put the environment under the threat of pollution. In fact, waste and rubbish are always challenging issues of environmentalists. These factors annihilate the environment, leading to the vanishment of flora and fauna. In addition, the health of both tourists and indigenous people is influenced negatively and severely by the aforementioned problems. For example, several countries in Kenya are in a bid to resolve contamination caused by foreign visitors when they come here to go hunting in safaris. To conclude, it is obvious that should the number of visitors increases, local people shall be facilitated to earn financial benefits thanks to activities related to tourism, however, they also be careful that the risk of pollution is predictable and may affect badly on their life.
Numerous nations are willing to welcome foreign tourists due to the affordability of travel abroad. This essay will suggest that creating job opportunities for the indigenous is the biggest advantage of this and contamination is the primary disadvantage.

Initially
, the increase in number of tourists brings about financial benefits for
local
persons. These individuals are capable of raising their income thanks to selling souvenirs, specialties or being tour-guides.
,
helping them ameliorate family condition
as well
as cover living costs.
Moreover
,
tourism
companies
or travel agencies have a tendency to employ indigenous dwellers
because
of their knowledge of
local
tradition and geography. By the way of illustration, the flourish of
tourism
help
people
living in Hawaii increase their monthly income
remarkably
and
improve
the education background of
local
children.

Despite these advantages, the development of
tourism
also
put the environment under the threat of pollution. In fact, waste and rubbish are always challenging issues of environmentalists. These factors annihilate the environment, leading to the
vanishment
of flora and fauna.
In addition
, the health of both tourists and indigenous
people
is
influenced
negatively
and
severely
by the aforementioned problems.
For example
, several countries in Kenya are in a bid to resolve contamination caused by foreign visitors when they
come
here to go hunting in safaris.

To conclude
, it is obvious that should the number of visitors increases,
local
people
shall
be facilitated
to earn financial benefits thanks to activities related to
tourism
,
however
, they
also
be careful that the
risk
of pollution is predictable and may affect
badly
on their life.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay International travel has become more affordable and many countries are opening their doors to increase the number of tourists What are the advantages and disadvantages of this v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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