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International travel has become cheaper, more and more countries have opened their doors and more tourist go abroad, for travelling. Do the advantages of increased tourism outweigh the disadvantages.

International travel has become cheaper, more and more countries have opened their doors and more tourist go abroad, for travelling. Do the advantages of increased tourism outweigh the disadvantages. gERa
Opportunities are given in this modern era, by nations to the visitors to visit more and more host countries for making the cheapest international travelling. According to me, Culture awareness and opportunities of jobs and business are two main benefits of this point of view. The main reason is that awareness about culture. If government gives chance to visitors for visiting its nation, tourists can easily know about the culture of nations, When they visit those places where they can get knowledge of people. Taking India as an example, Golden temple is the best attraction for tourists where millon of tourists per year visit that place to know about the culture of Sikhism. As a result, It is optional source of providing knowledge about cultures Another benefit is that job and business opportunities could be increased, Although tourists spend money on tourist places. It is a source of income for those people who do not have any work opportunities. On tourists places, people can start their business easily by starting business people can earn money to complete their desires. For instance, when someone visits to a new place at that time, he or she does not know about the locations of places then there is a guidence which is vital to tell about place and it creates opportunities of employment. Consequently, jobs and business opportunities will grow if tourists visit host nations However, Environment may be polluted by tourists as international tourists visit to new nations, at that time they prefer air plane to visit nation, and most of pollution level increases by traveling air. Moreover, tourists donot follow the guidelines of government which are important on tourist places to keep places neat and clean. For example, on tourists places, people do not throw rubbish in dustbin due to this, places get polluted. Thus, increasing environmental pollution could be proved detrimental deliterions for tourists In conclusion, although there are more benefits to attract tourists for visiting host nations, it has some drawbacks which cannot be neglected and this view has more beneficial as compares to drawbacks.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Opportunities
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in this modern era, by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
to the visitors to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
more and more host countries for making the cheapest international travelling.
This phrase can sound awkward in English. Consider using "in my opinion" or "I think".
According to me
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Culture
awareness and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
of jobs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
are two main benefits of this point of view.

The main reason is that awareness about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
gives chance to visitors for visiting its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
can
easily
know about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
, When they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
where they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Taking India as an example, Golden temple is the best attraction for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
where
Possible spelling mistake found.
millon
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
per year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
to know about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of Sikhism.
As a result
, It is optional source of providing knowledge about
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
cultures


Another benefit is that job and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
could
be increased
, Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
spend money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. It is a source of income for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do not have any work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
. On
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
easily
by starting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can earn money to complete their desires.
For instance
, when someone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visits
to a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
at that time, he or she does not know about the locations of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
then there is a
Possible spelling mistake found.
guidence
which is vital to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
and it creates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
of employment.
Consequently
, jobs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
will grow if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
host nations

However
, Environment may
be polluted
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
as international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
to new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
, at that time they prefer air
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
, and
Consider using "most pollution" or "most of the pollution".
most of pollution
level increases by traveling air.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
follow the guidelines of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
neat and clean.
For example
, on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not throw rubbish in dustbin due to this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
polluted.
Thus
, increasing environmental pollution could
be proved
detrimental
Possible spelling mistake found.
deliterions
for tourists

In conclusion
, although there are more benefits to attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
for visiting host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks which cannot
be neglected
and this view has more beneficial as compares to drawbacks.
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IELTS essay International travel has become cheaper, more and more countries have opened their doors and more tourist go abroad, for travelling. Do the advantages of increased tourism outweigh the disadvantages.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
346 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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