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international tourism is harmful for developing countries because it can damage local environment and culture, therefore it should be banned.to what extent do you agree or disagree

international tourism is harmful for developing countries because it can damage local environment and culture, therefore it should be banned. PM5AJ
It is true that many people believe in negative effects of international tourism for developing counties such as the damages on local environment and culture. That is why, they consider it should be prevented from developing. While I agree that protection of ecosystem and tradition are crucial, I do not agree that restrictions should be done for tourism. On the one hand, environment and culture play important role in a globalized world. If individuals do not pay attention for both issues, the consequences will be disastrous. To give just one example; global warming, air and water pollution as well as the loss of traditional values and historical background will become major challenges. As a result, people will suffer from a number of health problems or young generation will likely to be reluctant to respect old generation. Furthermore, variations among nations will disappear on account of international tourism. However, if instead of taking various measures to preserve the local environment or culture we simply try to ban tourism, I believe that we lose huge amount of income. With the help of international travelling a plethora of folks can find job vacancies because it offers wide range of job opportunities. it leads to the growth of GDP and it helps to reduce poverty among local individuals. Instead of restriction, some strict measures are a good solution to this case. For example; introduction laws to limit the carbon dioxide or imposing ‘’green taxes’’. In terms of culture, families play a role in passing knowledge of tradition on to the next generation. In conclusion, although people mainly want to ban international tourism, I believe that it is not proper solution to protection of environment and culture.
It is true that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
tourism for developing counties such as the damages on local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
That is
why, they consider it should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevented
from developing. While I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that protection of ecosystem and tradition are crucial, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that restrictions should
be done
for tourism.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in a globalized world. If individuals do not pay attention for both issues, the consequences will be disastrous. To give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one example; global warming, air and water pollution
as well
as the loss of traditional values and historical background will become major challenges.
As a result
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will suffer from a number of health problems or young generation will likely to be reluctant to respect
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
generation.
Furthermore
, variations among nations will disappear on account of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
tourism.

However
, if
instead
of taking various measures to preserve the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
we
simply
try to ban tourism, I believe that we lose huge amount of income. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
travelling a plethora of folks can find job vacancies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it offers wide range of job opportunities.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
leads to the growth of GDP and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
poverty among local individuals.
Instead
of restriction,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
strict measures are a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
solution to this case.
For example
; introduction laws to limit the carbon dioxide or imposing ‘’green taxes’’. In terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, families play a role in passing knowledge of tradition on to the
next
generation.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
mainly
want to ban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
tourism, I believe that it is not proper solution to protection of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
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IELTS essay international tourism is harmful for developing countries because it can damage local environment and culture, therefore it should be banned.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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