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International tourism has become one of the most valuable industry in the world . Some people believe that traveling abroad creates conflict rather than understanding between people from varied countries

International tourism has become one of the most valuable industry in the world. Some people believe that traveling abroad creates conflict rather than understanding between people from varied countries 0aeOq
With the advance of technology, International tourism has become one of the most valuable industry in the world. Some people believe that traveling abroad creates conflict rather than understanding between people from varied countries. As I see it, I disagree with this opinion, foreign traveling could make people obtain more knowledge about cultural diversity. First of all, International tourism would create numerous job opportunities in developing countries, With more people are employment their income would eventually go up. Foreign tourism could generate myriad advanced facilities, In addition attract companies or others country to sponsor it. Moreover, success in international tourism in developing country could their economy as well provide a better standards of living. Because of the rising income and the better facilities, residents would show some appreciates for the guests rather than creates conflict. A clear example that in America, there is a town is called “ china town” for Chinese to show respect and appreciation for the Chinese, who have been contributing in their tourism industry In numerous countries, citizens in there really love and adore foreigner. Whenever their see a guest from another country their would get excited and welcome them. Foreigners bring diverse backgrounds to the nation their visit, Residents and guests could absorb each other cultures and expand their knowledge. For instance, in Vietnam especially in Nha Trang or Da Nang have developed cuisine, accommodation to fit their visitor’s style. Hence, Vietnam has successful attracted numerous foreigners, some after visited the country would say their definitely coming back. On other hand, International tourism is really beneficial for the economy of the country. But we have to preserve our heritage because that is the most unique things in one nation. Visitors when coming to a different country should have respect their local moral and religious values.
With the advance of technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has become one of the most valuable
Please check whether a plural form of 'industry' should be used.
industry
in the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that traveling abroad creates conflict
rather
than understanding between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from varied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. As I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
it, I disagree with this opinion, foreign traveling could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
obtain more knowledge about cultural diversity.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
would create numerous job opportunities in developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, With more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are employment their income would
eventually
go up. Foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
could generate myriad advanced facilities,
In addition
attract
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
or others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to sponsor it.
Moreover
, success in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
in developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
could their economy
as well
provide a better standards of living.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the rising income and the better facilities, residents would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
appreciates for the guests
rather
than creates conflict. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
example that in America, there is a town
is called
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
“
china town” for Chinese to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
respect and appreciation for the Chinese, who have been contributing in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
industry


In numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, citizens in there
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
and adore foreigner. Whenever their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a guest from another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
their would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
excited and welcome them. Foreigners bring diverse backgrounds to the nation their visit, Residents and guests could absorb each other cultures and expand their knowledge.
For instance
, in Vietnam
especially
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nha
Possible spelling mistake found.
Trang
or
Possible spelling mistake found.
Da
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nang
have developed cuisine, accommodation to fit their visitor’s style.
Hence
, Vietnam has successful attracted numerous foreigners,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
after visited the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
would say their definitely coming back.

On other hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is
really
beneficial for the economy of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
preserve our heritage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that is
the
Consider using "unique".
most unique
things in one nation.

Visitors when coming to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should have respect their local moral and religious values.
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IELTS essay International tourism has become one of the most valuable industry in the world. Some people believe that traveling abroad creates conflict rather than understanding between people from varied countries

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
300 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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