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Influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of bio-diversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio-diversity? What solutions can you suggest? v.3

Influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of bio-diversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio-diversity? What solutions can you suggest? v. 3
In the modern era, mankind is focused on industrial growth and the economy. In this race for setting up the factories and the industries, man has forgotten that nature has blessed him with the beauty to cherish and ecosystem to mesmerize. Besides, we are too busy today in thinking about the future than enjoying the moment. In my opinion the primary cause for the loss of bio-diversity is a revolution in the financial sector and market. We are cutting forests, and using the land to build factories. Human is extravagant for using natural resources such as oil, water, and coal. However, he is not concerned about the impact of the outcome of these resource usage. Every coin has two sides. Excuse such as high demand for people's requirements, are the common one. But the responsible individuals have to understand that, they can maintain balance while fulfilling the high demands. The government bodies should come up with the ideas, in which lesser natural resources can deliver and complete the demand. Because the use of fossil fuels cause the air-pollution, and trimming the forest results in no habitat for the wild animals. There are plethora solutions for this environmental issue. The forest authorities should set up teams for monitoring the illegal desertification of the jungle. The government can design polices, which make it tough for industries to exploit the bio-diversity. Also, it is vital for the NGOs and environment agencies to make awareness programme. The schools and colleges can add this issue to their curriculum. To recapitulate, it is entirely possible to save the biodiversity and nature. We only need to take certain steps towards this direction and give a new start to this matter.
In the modern era, mankind
is focused
on industrial growth and the economy. In this race for setting up the factories and the industries,
man
has forgotten that nature has blessed him with the beauty to cherish and ecosystem to mesmerize.

Besides
, we are too busy
today
in thinking about the future than enjoying the moment. In my opinion the primary cause for the loss of bio-diversity is a revolution in the financial sector and market. We are cutting forests, and using the land to build factories. Human is extravagant for using natural resources such as oil, water, and coal.
However
, he is not concerned about the impact of the outcome of
these resource
usage.

Every coin has two sides. Excuse such as high demand for
people
's requirements, are the common one.
But
the responsible individuals
have to
understand that, they can maintain balance while fulfilling the high demands. The
government
bodies should
come
up with the
ideas
, in which lesser natural resources can deliver and complete the demand.
Because
the
use
of fossil fuels cause the air-pollution, and trimming the forest results in no habitat for the wild animals.

There are plethora solutions for this environmental issue. The forest authorities should set up teams for monitoring the illegal desertification of the jungle. The
government
can design polices, which
make
it tough for industries to exploit the bio-diversity.
Also
, it is vital for the NGOs and environment agencies to
make
awareness
programme
. The schools and colleges can
add
this issue to their curriculum.

To recapitulate, it is
entirely
possible to save the biodiversity and nature. We
only
need to take certain steps towards this direction and give a new
start
to this matter.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
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IELTS essay Influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of bio-diversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio-diversity? What solutions can you suggest? v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
283 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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