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The influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of bio-diversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio-diversity? What solutions can you suggest? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge. Write at least 250 words. v.2

The influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of bio-diversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio-diversity? What solutions can you suggest? v. 2
The diversity of vegetation and animals are on the verge of the extinction due to the damage caused by human being to the ecosystem of the world. This essay will first suggest that the reason of the issue is people’s irresponsibility for their waste and submit a creation of varied environmental programs as a viable solution. The main cause of the reduction of biological species is increased waste produced by people. Most of the garbage does not decompose and prevent the growth of plants. Furthermore it emits pollutants to the atmosphere which are destructive to the ecosystem. If organisms breathe with these poisonous gases, they will die out, leading to the loss of biodiversity. For example, conventional batteries are not merely eroding the soil; also they pollute the air with metals such as zinc and cadmium. The most practical solution to the problem is organization of environmental programs which helps people to understand the consequences of their indifference to their habitat. The raised awareness of this problem would lead many people choosing a less harmful product to the environment. Accordingly the level of harm might be decreased, letting species live. For instance, thank to the program called “No waste” in Kyzylorda myriad people minimized the number of products that they consume and it really improved air quality in this area. To conclude, irresponsibility of individuals to their waste is reason of the damage to the ecosystem and they have to realize it. It is predicted that environment gains stability when people produce less garbage.
The diversity of vegetation and animals are on the verge of the extinction due to the damage caused by human being to the ecosystem of the world. This essay will
first
suggest that the reason of the issue is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
irresponsibility for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
and submit a creation of varied environmental programs as a viable solution.

The main cause of the reduction of biological species
is increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
produced by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Most of the garbage does not decompose and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the growth of plants.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
it emits pollutants to the atmosphere which are destructive to the ecosystem. If organisms breathe with these poisonous gases, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
out, leading to the loss of biodiversity.
For example
, conventional batteries are not
merely
eroding the soil;
also
they pollute the air with metals such as zinc and cadmium.

The most practical solution to the problem is organization of environmental programs which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to understand the consequences of their indifference to their habitat. The raised awareness of this problem would lead
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choosing a less harmful product to the environment.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Accordingly
the level of harm might
be decreased
, letting species
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
For instance
, thank to the program called “No
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste”
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kyzylorda
myriad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
minimized the number of products that they consume and it
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
air quality in this area.

To conclude
, irresponsibility of individuals to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
is reason of the damage to the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
ecosystem and
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
realize it. It
is predicted
that environment gains stability when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
produce less garbage.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay The influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of bio-diversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio-diversity? What solutions can you suggest? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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