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Independent TOEFL essay - TPO 3: Agree or disagree: It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends. v.2

Independent TOEFL essay - TPO 3: Agree or disagree: It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends. v. 2
There is no doubt that social relationships play a decisive role in every individual' s life. Everybody needs to recognize the people who they communicate with. This often brings up a controversial question. Which one is more important: keeping an old friend or making a new one? In this regard, some people are more inclined toward the opinion that it is worth keeping old friends whereas others hold exactly the opposite perspective, believing that making new friends is more important. From my point of view, old friends are the best ones since knowing people for a long time helps to recognize a real friend who is confidant and sincere. In the following paragraphs, I will elaborate on my perspectives. One of the reasons that immediately comes to mind is that you can trust on your old friends. As they have already passed your reliability test, you can confide in your trustworthy old friends. You can reveal your secrets with no worries about relating your secrets to others. For example, a friend of mine is very talkative and doesn' t pay attention to what she says. Since I know her for a long time as a person who relates whatever comes out of her mouth, I never share my secrets with her. That' s why old relationships are very important in our lives, especially old friendships. As mentioned in the previous paragraphs, a long relationship introduces the sincere friend. Everybody feels uneasy about a liar, insincere friend. When you encounter a problem and need help, you cannot count on such friends aiding you in solving your problem. Since those friends don' t sympathize indeed, they cannot feel your emotions, thereby not being able to help you handle your issue, anxiety, stress and so forth. This clarifies the fact that old relationships are effective in the life because they help you know people. Decisively, if one compares the advantages and disadvantages of old and new friendships, one soon realizes that keeping old friendships is more essential. Although new friends will be old ones some day, the time spent with a friend plays a decisive role in your relationships, especially in recognizing confidant and sincere people. Nowadays, people need more social relations with good friends because of the modern complexities of life. Technology assists with keeping in touch with friends as well, even if they are located on the other side of the world.
There is no doubt that social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
play a decisive role in every
Possible spelling mistake found.
individual&
#039; s life. Everybody needs to recognize the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who they communicate with. This
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
brings up a controversial question. Which one is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
: keeping an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
or making a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
one? In this regard,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more inclined toward the opinion that it is worth keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
whereas others hold exactly the opposite perspective, believing that making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. From my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
are the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
since knowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for a long time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to recognize a real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
who is confidant and sincere. In the following paragraphs, I will elaborate on my perspectives.

One of the reasons that immediately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to mind is that you can trust on your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. As they have already passed your reliability
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
, you can confide in your trustworthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. You can reveal your secrets with no worries about relating your secrets to others.
For example
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
of mine is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
talkative and
Possible spelling mistake found.
doesn&
#039; t pay attention to what she says. Since I know her for a long time as a person who relates whatever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
out of her mouth, I never share my secrets with her.
Possible spelling mistake found.
That&
#039; s why
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old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
,
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
friendships.

As mentioned in the previous paragraphs, a long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
introduces the sincere
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
. Everybody feels uneasy about a liar, insincere
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
. When you encounter a problem and need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
, you cannot count on such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
aiding you in solving your problem. Since those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
Possible spelling mistake found.
don&
#039; t sympathize
indeed
, they cannot feel your emotions, thereby not being able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you handle your issue, anxiety,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forth. This clarifies the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
are effective in the life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
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help
you know
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Decisively
, if one compares the advantages and disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friendships, one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
realizes that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
friendships is more essential. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
day, the time spent with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
plays a decisive role in your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
,
especially
in recognizing confidant and sincere
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need more social relations with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the modern complexities of life. Technology assists with keeping in touch with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
as well
, even if they
are located
on the other side of the world.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Independent TOEFL essay - TPO 3: Agree or disagree: It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
401 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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