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Increasing travels between countries enable people to learn different cultures or to increase tension between people from different countries? v.3

Increasing travels between countries enable people to learn different cultures or to increase tension between people from different countries? v. 3
Every country in the world has a history that has been created by people. According to the civilization and culture, it can be attractive to other people of the nations. So, visiting these countries is significant for people who create tours for more acquaintance with the culture. According to the United Nations World Tourism Organization (UNWTO), the number of tourists visiting other countries is growing by 30% each year. However, the contrast of cultures between different countries can have advantages and disadvantages. If the tourism industry develops with planning, it will have positive effects. Increasing employment and an economic boom are one of the most important reasons for the tourism industry. It allows indigenous peoples of the countries to present their rich customs, traditions, lifestyles, and cultures to the world. Moreover, the high number of tourists in the country increases the international relations of the tourist country, which boosts trade and cultural communication. On the other hand, inappropriate tourism development can increase tensions between people from different countries. Most of the time, tourists are indifferent or unaware of the national beliefs and cultural habits of a country, such as the type of clothing, customs, or food of the local people, which is one of the main challenges of the tourism industry. Besides, the annual arrival of large numbers of tourists and their overcrowding in one place can cause serious damage to the historical monuments and the environment. Eventually, given the many benefits and enjoyments that a trip can have, having information and awareness of the culture and rules of countries will reduce problems. ''The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page''. (St. Augustine)
Every
country
in the
world
has a history that has
been created
by
people
. According to the civilization and
culture
, it can be attractive to other
people
of the nations.
So
, visiting these
countries
is significant for
people
who create tours for more acquaintance with the culture.

According to the United Nations
World
Tourism
Organization (
UNWTO
), the number of
tourists
visiting other
countries
is growing by 30% each year.
However
, the contrast of
cultures
between
different
countries
can have advantages and disadvantages.

If the
tourism
industry develops with planning, it will have
positive
effects. Increasing employment and an economic boom are one of the most
important
reasons for the
tourism
industry. It
allows
indigenous
peoples
of the
countries
to present their rich customs, traditions, lifestyles, and
cultures
to the
world
.
Moreover
, the high number of
tourists
in the
country
increases the international relations of the
tourist
country
, which boosts trade and cultural communication.

On the other hand
, inappropriate
tourism
development can increase tensions between
people
from
different
countries
. Most of the time,
tourists
are indifferent or unaware of the national beliefs and cultural habits of a
country
, such as the type of clothing, customs, or food of the local
people
, which is one of the main challenges of the
tourism
industry.

Besides
, the annual arrival of large numbers of
tourists
and their overcrowding in one place can cause serious damage to the historical monuments and the environment.

Eventually
,
given
the
many
benefits and enjoyments that a trip can have, having information and awareness of the
culture
and
rules
of
countries
will
reduce
problems.

''The
world
is a book and those who do not travel read
only
one page''.

(St. Augustine)
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Increasing travels between countries enable people to learn different cultures or to increase tension between people from different countries? v. 3

Essay
  American English
8 paragraphs
279 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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