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Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective? v.12

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. What other measures do you think might be effective? v. 12
Owing to the problems of high level of traffic and the increase of pollution, it is considered that increase in the price of petrol is the most effective way in solving these problems. I agree that increase in petrol price will help in fighting these problems. However there are other policies that can be implemented. Generally speaking, whenever a commodity is sold at a lower price, the demand tends to increase. However, the increase in price brings about a decrease in demand. This aptly summarizes the law of demand and supply. From this concept, increasing the price of petrol will not only lower its consumption by road users, particularly car owners and heavy duty vehicles leading to a reduction in traffic rate but also will hinder factories that buy and burn premium motor spirit as fuel. It would force a decrease in the number of automobiles bought whilst ensuring efficiency of the existing ones. But nations and regulation authorities can do more to curb carbon emission. They can do so by providing carbon emission quotas to industries and vehicle companies. Through a quota system, they can regulate the emission level per city and ensuring a green environment. This cap helps the authorities to generate revenue, improve the ambient air quality and lives of her citizenry. Nonetheless, measures like heavy taxing of factories, traffic regulations such as driving only on specific days of the week will also contribute to the eradication of the aforementioned problem. Auto companies can also invest heavily in research and development. This would help in the invention of carbon efficient engines and eventually help to ameliorate the emission of greenhouse gases. In conclusion, in as much as increasing the price of fuel will help in solving the growth of traffic and pollution in different cities, there will be an economic effect to this. Implementing other measures together with the price increase will do a great deal in mitigating the problems.
Owing to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
of high level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
of pollution, it
is considered
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of petrol is the most effective way in solving these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in petrol
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in fighting these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
there are other policies that can
be implemented
.

Generally
speaking, whenever a commodity
is sold
at a lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
, the demand tends to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
.
However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
brings about a decrease in demand. This
aptly
summarizes the law of demand and supply. From this concept, increasing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of petrol will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
lower its consumption by road users,
particularly
car owners and
'heavy duty' seems to be a compound adjective in front of a noun. Use a hyphen: "heavy-duty".
heavy duty
vehicles leading to a reduction in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
rate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
will hinder factories that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
and burn premium motor spirit as fuel. It would force a decrease in the number of automobiles
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
whilst ensuring efficiency of the existing ones.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
nations and regulation authorities can do more to curb carbon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emission
. They can do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
by providing carbon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emission
quotas to industries and vehicle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
. Through a quota system, they can regulate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emission
level per city and ensuring a green environment. This cap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
the authorities to generate revenue,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the ambient air quality and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of her citizenry.

Nonetheless, measures like heavy taxing of factories,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
regulations such as driving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on specific days of the week will
also
contribute to the eradication of the aforementioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. Auto
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
can
also
invest
heavily
in research and development. This would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in the invention of carbon efficient engines and
eventually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to ameliorate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emission
of greenhouse gases.

In conclusion
, in as much as increasing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of fuel will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in solving the growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
and pollution in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cities, there will be an economic effect to this. Implementing other measures together with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
will do a great deal in mitigating the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
31Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
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IELTS essay Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. What other measures do you think might be effective? v. 12

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
323 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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