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Write about the following topic : In your opinion, should people choose their professions, or should their parents for them? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

: In your opinion, should people choose their professions, or should their parents for them? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience ABRLl
Choosing a carrier can be a difficult task, some people choose their professions on their own, some take advice from their parents. I opine that both sides can be considered while choosing a profession. The principle reason that someone should listen to their parents while choosing a carrier is that, all the parents think good for their children and no parent will give a wrong advice to their child, so it will be helpful and convenient that someone who is in a dilemma for not being able to choose their carrier on their own should definitely listen to their elders. For example while I have a friend in my college, He told me once how in his school he was always confused about his carrier, but when he told his problem to his parents they told him to do engineering as he was good in maths, now in my college he is a topper of our branch and doing good in his carrier. In contrary, their are some relatives, parents, who always pressurize their children, and want them do what they wanted to do while they were young. This result in a lot of mental disturbance for the children, and some end up being a poor student, with low grades, because of the mental pressure being put on them. So, while choosing a carrier in such cases, student should not listen to their parents, and do what they love to do. This will result in achieving more in life professionally, and eventually parents will start supporting them, like I have a cousin who used to play lot of games and he was good in that, but his parents always used to tell him to study instead of wasting time, but he always wanted to something in the gaming industry, now he is a big youtuber he plays games on streaming with other big youtubers and is doing pretty good in life. In conclusion, I want to say that their is no black or white everything is grey, same is with choosing a carrier, it depends what kind of parents you have, supportive, or not, depending on that students should choose their profession.
Choosing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carrier
can be a difficult task,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
choose their professions on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
take advice from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. I opine that both sides can
be considered
while choosing a profession.

The
Did you mean "principal" (=main)?
principle
reason that someone should listen to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
while choosing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carrier
is that, all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
for their children and no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
will give a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
advice to their child,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will be helpful and convenient that someone who is in a dilemma for not being able to choose their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carrier
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
should definitely listen to their elders.
For example
while I have a friend in my college, He
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
me once how in his school he was always confused about his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carrier
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
his problem to his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
him to do engineering as he was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
in
Possible spelling mistake. 'maths' is British English.
maths
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
in my college he is a topper of our branch and doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
in his carrier.

In contrary,
Did you mean "there"?
their
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
relatives,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, who always pressurize their children, and want them do what they wanted to do while they were young. This result in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
mental disturbance for the children, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "ends"?
end
up being a poor student, with low grades,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the mental pressure
being put
on them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, while choosing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carrier
in such cases, student should not listen to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, and do what they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to do. This will result in achieving more in life
professionally
, and
eventually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
supporting them, like I have a cousin who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to play
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
games and
he was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
in that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
him to study
instead
of wasting time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he always wanted to something in the gaming industry,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
he is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
Possible spelling mistake found.
youtuber
he plays games on streaming with other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
Possible spelling mistake found.
youtubers
and is doing pretty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
in life.

In conclusion
, I want to say that
Did you mean "there"?
their
is no black or white everything is
Possible spelling mistake. 'grey' is British English.
grey
, same is with choosing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carrier
, it
The verb 'to depend' requires the preposition '(up)on': "depends on".
depends
what kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
you have, supportive, or not, depending on that students should choose their profession.
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IELTS essay : In your opinion, should people choose their professions, or should their parents for them? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
362 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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