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In western countries, children face the biggest problem such as obesity, thus the number of unhealthy juveniles increased dramatically over ten years.

In western countries, children face the biggest problem such as obesity, thus the number of unhealthy juveniles increased dramatically over ten years. dkB1p
In western countries, children face the biggest problem such as obesity, thus the number of unhealthy juveniles increased dramatically over ten years. This essay will show firstly what are the reasons for being excessive weighted children and secondly how this situation has poor effects on them. On the one hand, there is a great deal of causes. One of the most popular is a sedentary lifestyle. Today’s children prefer to opt for an inactive routine rather than to deal with any pursuits such as cycling, swimming, basketball and so on. Moreover, the addictive nature of engineered food makes our offsprings depend on the processed food which is the cornerstone of being overweight. For example, last week CNN reported that eating disorders, poor diet as well as a passive life force teens to fight with the most dangerous health issue - adiposity. On the other hand, being obese has a large amount of effects on children. First of all, it might cause other health problems such as diabetes, high pressure, heart attack and so on. Additionally, to be overweighted person destroy their confidence to socialize and go out which are important for them to develop their interpersonal skills. For instance, in 2015, 14-years-old teenagers got depressed and attempted suicide stemmed from obesity in America. To sum up, junk food and lack of exercise create hard situations and various diseases especially overweight for our offsprings. In addition, being unhealthy and bad appearance ruin their psychology and hinder their development.
In western countries,
children
face the biggest problem such as obesity,
thus
the number of unhealthy juveniles increased
dramatically
over ten years. This essay will
show
firstly
what are the reasons for being excessive weighted
children
and
secondly
how this situation has poor effects on them.

On the one hand, there is a great deal of causes. One of the most
popular
is a sedentary lifestyle.
Today
’s
children
prefer to opt for an inactive routine
rather
than to deal with any pursuits such as cycling, swimming, basketball and
so
on.
Moreover
, the addictive nature of engineered food
makes
our
offsprings
depend on the processed food which is the cornerstone of being overweight.
For example
, last week CNN reported that eating disorders, poor diet
as well
as a passive life force teens to fight with the most
dangerous
health issue
-
adiposity
.

On the other hand
, being obese has a large amount of effects on
children
.
First of all
, it might cause other health problems such as diabetes, high pressure, heart attack and
so
on.
Additionally
, to be
overweighted
person
destroy
their confidence to socialize and go out which are
important
for them to develop their interpersonal
skills
.
For instance
, in 2015, 14-years-
old
teenagers
got
depressed and attempted suicide stemmed from obesity in America.

To sum up, junk food and lack of exercise create
hard
situations and various diseases
especially
overweight for our
offsprings
.
In addition
, being unhealthy and
bad
appearance ruin their psychology and hinder their development.
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IELTS essay In western countries, children face the biggest problem such as obesity, thus the number of unhealthy juveniles increased dramatically over ten years.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
247 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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