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Some people think that laws should be passed to assess nutrition and food choices to improve public health. Others think this is wrong.

Some people think that laws should be passed to assess nutrition and food choices to improve public health. Others think this is wrong. 66JrG
In today’s modern world, public health has been a concern. When it comes to this topic, some individuals raise their voice to propose laws towards nutrition and diets so as to enhance people’s health. While I am in favour of food choices’ importance towards health, I reckon that there are more factors affecting it. On the one hand, it is believed that nutrition plays an integral role in health. Initially, by assessing a food intake, the governments can rest assured of a balanced diet for residents containing an essential amount of carbohydrate, lipit, minerals, etc. With a good eating plan, people stand a higher chance of having a healthier life as they have sufficient calories and nutrition from food to maintain a fit body. For instance, life expectancy in Japanese is considerably high in comparison to other countries due to their high-protein diet. On the other hand, there are some factors that directly do harm to our health. Firstly, the shortage of free time is conducive to health-related problems. Owing to hectic schedules at work and schools, employees and students these days lack in time for relaxation. As a matter of fact, both do not only have to work from nine to five but also have to attend extra classes or work extra shifts, which means there is barely any time left for other activities let alone entertaining or doing exercises. This results in extreme stress or even worse, depression. Moreover, because of the development of technology, if there is free time, people have a tendency to stay at home playing video games rather than go out for a refreshing walk. As a result, this sedentary lifestyle might lead to obesity due to calories surplus In conclusion, while I admit that diet plays a crucial role to people’s health, other factors such as a sedentary lifestyle and lack of time resulting from over-stressed schedules do matter too. Therefore, the governments as well as individuals should put all methods into consideration in order to raise public health.
In
today
’s modern world, public
health
has been a concern. When it
comes
to this topic,
some
individuals raise their voice to propose laws towards nutrition and diets
so as to
enhance
people’s
health
. While I am in
favour
of food choices’ importance towards
health
, I reckon that there are more factors affecting it.

On the one hand, it
is believed
that nutrition plays an integral role in
health
.
Initially
, by assessing a food intake, the
governments
can rest assured of a balanced diet for residents containing an essential amount of carbohydrate,
lipit
, minerals, etc. With a
good
eating plan,
people
stand a higher chance of having a healthier life as they have sufficient calories and nutrition from food to maintain a fit body.
For instance
, life expectancy in Japanese is
considerably
high
in comparison
to
other
countries due to their high-protein diet.

On the
other
hand, there are
some
factors that
directly
do harm to our
health
.
Firstly
, the shortage of free
time
is conducive to health-related problems. Owing to hectic schedules at work and schools, employees and students these days lack in
time
for relaxation. As a matter of fact, both do not
only
have to
work from nine to five
but
also
have to
attend extra classes or work extra shifts, which means there is
barely
any
time
left
for
other
activities
let
alone entertaining or doing exercises. This results in extreme
stress
or even worse, depression.
Moreover
,
because
of the development of technology, if there is free
time
,
people
have a tendency to stay at home playing video games
rather
than go out for a refreshing walk.
As a result
, this sedentary lifestyle might lead to obesity due to calories
surplus


In conclusion
, while I admit that diet plays a crucial role to
people’s
health
,
other
factors such as a sedentary lifestyle and lack of
time
resulting from over-
stressed
schedules do matter too.
Therefore
, the
governments
as well
as individuals should put all methods into consideration in order to raise public
health
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that laws should be passed to assess nutrition and food choices to improve public health. Others think this is wrong.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
336 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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