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In the past, Indian citizens had been fighting against to get the freedom.

In the past, Indian citizens had been fighting against to get the freedom. This will provide them a positive atmosphere where one should choose the path they want. Some people believe that the celebrities are given the surroundings to develop their skills. I strongly support this view. The essay will discuss my stance with arguments in below paragraphs. To begin with, the predominant reason to provide the freedom to the artist is that helps to explore their skills. As they have no fear of falling the rules; they can add their creativity in their work by giving more dedication on that. Moreover, getting this free atmosphere will increase their confidence. As a result, they start to do the hard work and serve the society in a better way. This will provide them money, which delivers the luxurious life also. For example, they can serve the society having telephone figure salary; the laymen want to follow them in their future. Furthermore, some of celebrities can start the academy in which they can promote their art. This type of work helps them to get the refreshment from their routine work. However, this will also help them to release their stress and maintain their fitness. By getting freedom from the authority; this person expands their growth as well. For instance, many artists help the youngsters by telling their stories which give them strength to deal with the troubles. In conclusion, getting the freedom is a rudimentary need of every person. As per my opinion, the artist can excel their skills as having no fear of falling the rules and serve the society by their own unique way.
In the past, Indian citizens had been fighting against to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
. This will provide them a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
atmosphere where one should choose the path they want.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the celebrities are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the surroundings to develop their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. I
strongly
support this view. The essay will discuss my stance with arguments in below paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the predominant reason to provide the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to the artist is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to explore their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. As they have no fear of falling the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
; they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
their creativity in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
by giving more dedication on that.
Moreover
, getting this free atmosphere will increase their confidence.
As a result
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to do the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and serve the society in a better way. This will provide them money, which delivers the luxurious life
also
.
For example
, they can serve the society having telephone figure salary; the laymen want to follow them in their future.

Furthermore
,
After ‘some of’, you should use ‘the’ (“some of the celebrities”) or simply say “some celebrities”.
some of celebrities
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
the academy in which they can promote their art. This type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the refreshment from their routine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
However
, this will
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to release their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and maintain their fitness. By getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
from the authority; this person expands their growth
as well
.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
artists
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the youngsters by telling their stories which give them strength to deal with the troubles.

In conclusion
, getting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
is a rudimentary need of every person. As per my opinion, the artist can excel their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as having no fear of falling the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and serve the society by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
unique way.
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IELTS essay In the past, Indian citizens had been fighting against to get the freedom.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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