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In the last decade, there has been an increase in the number and variety of online courses available to adults. While welcomed as a great opportunity by many students, other students see these courses as a poor substitute for classroom teaching. What are the advantages and disadvantages of studying an online course? v.4

In the last decade, there has been an increase in the number and variety of online courses available to adults. While welcomed as a great opportunity by many students, other students see these courses as a poor substitute for classroom teaching. What are the advantages and disadvantages of studying an online course? v. 4
Nowadays, adults are able to study online as a wide range of courses have been provided, but it has certain drawbacks too. This essay will examine the positive and negative of online lessons and provide a logical conclusion. The two main advantages of people taking courses on the internet are to have flexible time learning with affordable price. Firstly, people can obtain new knowledge 24/7 everyday in the condition of having the internet anywhere. For example, office workers are able to study after finishing their job on weekdays or learning on weekends, which helps them to improve personal abilities or learns new skills in order to be used at workforce. Another advantage of this is that many people can afford the price of the courses as there is no issues of renting classrooms and teachers do not need to pay agency fee for organizations. This, hence, brings the number of positive benefits to both sides. On the other hands, online study also has major disadvantages, such as no face to face interaction and physical damage. It is generally claimed that people cannot meet other students if they learn online. Also, studying online may cause myopia or the problems of the body movement. For instance, students have to stare long hours of time at the screen and this has an adverse impact on their eyes. What is more, the fact that people typically seat to use their computers so, in the long term of seating on the chair, may cause the difficulty of physical movements. In conclusion, while online lessons give people a chance to learn 24/7 at a much cheaper price, compared with classroom teaching, there are some drawbacks, like lack of physical interaction and the damage of the eyes and body movements. Therefore, online lessons have its pros and cons.
Nowadays, adults are able to study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
as a wide range of courses have
been provided
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it has certain drawbacks too. This essay will examine the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
lessons and provide a logical conclusion.

The two main advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
taking courses on the internet are to have flexible time learning with affordable price.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can obtain new knowledge 24/7
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
in the condition of having the internet anywhere.
For example
, office workers are able to study after finishing their job on weekdays or learning on weekends, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
personal abilities or learns new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in order to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
at workforce. Another advantage of this is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can afford the price of the courses as there is no issues of renting classrooms and teachers do not need to pay agency fee for organizations. This,
hence
, brings the number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
benefits to both sides.

On the other hands,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
study
also
has major disadvantages, such as no face to face interaction and physical damage. It is
generally
claimed that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
other students if they learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
.
Also
, studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
may cause myopia or the problems of the body movement.
For instance
, students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
stare long hours of time at the screen and this has an adverse impact on their eyes.
What is more
, the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
typically
seat to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their computers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, in the long term of seating on the chair, may cause the difficulty of physical movements.

In conclusion
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
lessons give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
a chance to learn 24/7 at a much cheaper price, compared with classroom teaching, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks, like lack of physical interaction and the
The usual collocation for word "damage" is "to" not "of." Revise: "damage to".
damage of
the eyes and body movements.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
lessons have its pros and cons.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay In the last decade, there has been an increase in the number and variety of online courses available to adults. While welcomed as a great opportunity by many students, other students see these courses as a poor substitute for classroom teaching. What are the advantages and disadvantages of studying an online course? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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