Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In the development world people are living longer, What problems with this cause. Suggest some solutions that could be taken to reduce the effect of this solution

In the development world people are living longer, What problems with this cause. Suggest some solutions that could be taken to reduce the effect of this solution m5pNN
In the present age, the number of people living longer has increased. In fact, this has created many problems to the people of concern. Therefore, in this essay, I am going to state the main matters of this trend and try to offer some possible solutions. In the first place, there is no denying that there are some challenges here. The first problem might be that a greater tax burden for working adult. This could be because there are more people of retirement age who would receive a pension and governments in these countries usually receive less formoney in taxes. Also, another matter can be a rise in the demand for healthcare. This might be because old people often get some kinds of disease. Therefore, the government from those countries have to invest more in healthcare and young adult will increasingly have to look after their elderly relatives more. It is true to say that the abve complications have bad influences. So, some solutions should be given. The first step is to increase the retirement age for working adult, perhaps from 65 to 70. This can help because nowadays, people of this age tend to be healthy enough to work effectively. In addition to this, the matter should be solve by encouraging immigration. This might help to increase the number of working adults who pay taxes. All things considered, the issue of living longer have been growing and still continue to develop day by day. Thus, it is important for us to try our best find out solutions so that we can reduce the risks. It is my firm belief that eccouraging immigration and increasing the retirement age.
In the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living longer has increased. In fact, this has created
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of concern.
Therefore
, in this essay, I am going to state the main matters of this trend and try to offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
possible solutions.

In the
first
place, there is no denying that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
challenges here. The
first
problem might be that a greater tax burden for working adult. This could be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of retirement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
who would receive a pension and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
in these countries
usually
receive less
Possible spelling mistake found.
formoney
in taxes.
Also
, another matter can be a rise in the demand for healthcare. This might be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kinds of disease.
Therefore
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
from those countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
invest more in healthcare and young adult will
increasingly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
look after their elderly relatives more.

It is true to say that the
Possible spelling mistake found.
abve
complications have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influences.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solutions should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
. The
first
step is to increase the retirement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for working adult, perhaps from 65 to 70. This can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
tend to be healthy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to work
effectively
.
In addition
to this, the matter should be
Consider using the past participle "solved"?
solve
by encouraging immigration. This might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to increase the number of working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
who pay taxes.

All things considered, the issue of living longer have been growing and
still
continue to develop day by day.
Thus
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for us to try our best find out solutions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
. It is my firm belief that
Possible spelling mistake found.
eccouraging
immigration and increasing the retirement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay In the development world people are living longer, What problems with this cause. Suggest some solutions that could be taken to reduce the effect of this solution

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • In the development world people are living longer, What problems with this cause. Suggest some solutions that could be taken to reduce the effect of this solution