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In the 21st century, television reality stars become a famouse among the youngsters due to the wide availablity of broad cast channels at very nominal rate. There are a plethora of benefits for the stars due to their immense fame. However, they have to suffre a lot due this fame.

In the 21st century, television reality stars become a famouse among the youngsters due to the wide availablity of broad cast channels at very nominal rate. There are a plethora of benefits for the stars due to their immense fame. However, they have to suffre a lot due this fame. OwM5k
In the 21st century, television reality stars become a famouse among the youngsters due to the wide availablity of broad cast channels at very nominal rate. There are a plethora of benefits for the stars due to their immense fame. However, they have to suffre a lot due this fame. To commence with, there are multifarious advantages which are associated with the fame for the tv stars. Primary benifit is that they get hafty some of money from the manufacturer to advertise their products in the various platforms. Additionally, their fees are vary with their popularity. For instance, Rahul sharma, winner of Khatro ke khiladi show before some years, charge two time fees compare to the past year as his fan base has risen to three times. Second advantages of their fame is that they may get more movies or tv shows from the directors or producers. For example, no one know kapil sharma befor success of his show (commedy nights with kapil sharma) and after this success he got many films. Although, tv stars get various advantages of his fame, they have to suffre a lot in their lives due to their fame. First and for most disadvantage of this is, each and every time, they are followed by the photographer for taking their photos or by their fanes for taking their autographs and due to that they have to go with their security guards. Moreover, the charge of this private security is very high. Second disadvantage is that they are not able to enjoy their personal lives. They can not go for meal
In the 21st century, television reality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stars
become a
Possible spelling mistake found.
famouse
among the youngsters
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the wide
Possible spelling mistake found.
availablity
of broad cast channels at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
nominal rate. There are a plethora of benefits for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stars
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to their immense
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
.
However
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
Possible spelling mistake found.
suffre
a lot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
this fame.

To commence with, there are multifarious advantages which
are associated
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stars
. Primary
Possible spelling mistake found.
benifit
is that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Possible spelling mistake found.
hafty
Consider using "some money" or "some of the money".
some of money
from the manufacturer to advertise their products in the various platforms.
Additionally
, their fees are
Consider using a past participle here: "varied".
vary
with their popularity.
For instance
, Rahul
Possible spelling mistake found.
sharma
, winner of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Khatro
Possible spelling mistake found.
ke
Possible spelling mistake found.
khiladi
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
years, charge two time fees compare to the past year as his fan base has risen to three times. Second advantages of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
is that they may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more movies or
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
from the directors or producers.
For example
, no one know
Possible spelling mistake found.
kapil
Possible spelling mistake found.
sharma
Possible spelling mistake found.
befor
success of his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
(
Possible spelling mistake found.
commedy
nights with
Possible spelling mistake found.
kapil
Possible spelling mistake found.
sharma
) and after this success he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
films.

Although,
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stars
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
various advantages of his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
Possible spelling mistake found.
suffre
a lot in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
.
First
and for most disadvantage of this is, each and every time, they
are followed
by the photographer for taking their photos or by their
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "fans", the plural form of the noun 'fan'?
fanes
for taking their autographs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
go with
their security guards.
Moreover
, the charge of this private security is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high. Second disadvantage is that they are not able to enjoy their personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. They can not go for
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
meal
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IELTS essay In the 21st century, television reality stars become a famouse among the youngsters due to the wide availablity of broad cast channels at very nominal rate. There are a plethora of benefits for the stars due to their immense fame. However, they have to suffre a lot due this fame.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
264 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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