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It is more imporant ofr students to study history than it is for them to study science. Do you agree or disagree with this satement?

It is more imporant ofr students to study history than it is for them to study science. with this satement? pe5ED
Nowadays, people around the world are living in the country which is scientifically and technically developed. The uses of electronic equipments in the school or house for learning are increasing substantially, and now it is impossible to imagine the life without them. Whereas, the importance of historical facts are diminishing due to lack of attention of people. On the one hand, as the science have taken charge of significant parts of our life, students should study wildspread knowledges which contain scientific studies, and to learn physics and chemistry is becoming to be common sense. For instance, some urgent accident can be prevented such as injury or fire in the spaces which are inadequate to handle the situation. To be specific, the fire in the house can be quickly managed by student, if he or she knows various sorts of fire-fighting measures even they are alone. However, it is undeniable that because human in the past have already experienced, the information for present is existed. We never know if they did not encounter a number of conditions in the past; for example, we have known the facts that the gender and human right is equal and there must be rules and people should follow them to live in society. Thus, students must understand and have a good attitude the history that how our ancestor persisted and what is the lessons from the past. To conclude, to study science could be important for the further future, however, I firmly beileve that students should know history of human’s to do not forget the lessons and cultures because present is also the one of histories.
Nowadays,
people
around the world are living in the country which is
scientifically
and
technically
developed. The
uses
of electronic equipments in the school or
house
for learning are increasing
substantially
, and
now
it is impossible to imagine the life without them.
Whereas
, the importance of historical facts are diminishing due to lack of attention of
people
.

On the one hand, as the science have taken charge of significant parts of our life,
students
should study
wildspread
knowledges
which contain scientific studies, and to learn physics and chemistry is becoming to be common sense.
For instance
,
some
urgent accident can be
prevented
such as injury or fire in the spaces which are inadequate to handle the situation. To be specific, the fire in the
house
can be
quickly
managed by
student
, if he or she knows various sorts of fire-fighting measures even they are alone.

However
, it is undeniable that
because
human in the past have already experienced, the information for present
is existed
. We never know if they did not encounter a number of conditions in the past;
for example
, we have known the facts that the gender and human right is equal and there
must
be
rules
and
people
should follow them to
live
in society.
Thus
,
students
must
understand and have a
good
attitude the history that how our ancestor persisted and what is the lessons from the past.

To conclude
, to study science could be
important
for the
further
future,
however
, I
firmly
beileve
that
students
should know history of human’s to do not forget the lessons and cultures
because
present is
also
the one of histories.
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IELTS essay It is more imporant ofr students to study history than it is for them to study science. with this satement?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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