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In some parts of the world it is becoming popular to research the history of one's own family Why might people want to do this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Genealogy is not a new field and people, especially the noble class, have always been keen on knowing more about the history of their families and ancestors. However, it has recently enjoyed more popularity with many ordinary people, especially in the western world, trying to fill in the gaps in their family trees; a trend I personally disapprove of. One reason why many people are curious about their family history these days is that it is often fun to trace back one’s bloodline and find out if one is related to any famous people. I remember a recent story about how a common supermarket clerk in Nevada was discovered to be a descendant of a British king. Many such descendants live completely ordinary lives, to which a discovery like that can bring many thrills. Additionally, it would definitely help people to realise how their families have changed through the years and therefore, learn a thing or two about the causes of failure and prosperity in different generations. However, many individuals who find themselves related to the nobility tend to consider tiny shares of noble blood as birthright to more respect. They, for instance, often demand seats in public transport when there are more deserving people like pregnant women or the elderly aboard. Apart from that, some of them might overgeneralise the role of factors which have contributed to a former generation’s condition, be it inherited wealth or even bad luck, to their own and disregard the value of their own ideas, efforts and current status. In conclusion, I am not sure if the growing trend towards researching one’s ancestors and family line is actually helping people and the society in general, and believe it must be discouraged.
Genealogy is not a new field and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
especially
the noble
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, have always

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
been
keen on knowing more about the history of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
and ancestors.

However
, it has recently enjoyed more popularity with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,

especially
in the western world, trying to fill in the gaps in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
trees; a trend

I
personally
disapprove of.

One reason why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are curious about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
history these days is

that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
fun to trace back one’s bloodline and find out if one
is related
to any

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. I remember a recent story about how a common supermarket
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
clerk


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
in
Nevada
was discovered
to be a descendant of a British king.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
such


descendants
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
completely ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, to which a discovery like that can bring

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
many
thrills.
Additionally
, it would definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
Possible spelling mistake. ‘realise’ is British English.
realise
how their

families have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
through the years and
therefore
, learn a thing or two about

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
the
causes of failure and prosperity in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
generations.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals who find themselves related to the nobility tend to

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
consider
tiny shares of noble blood as birthright to more respect. They,
for instance
,

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
demand seats in public transport when there are more deserving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
pregnant
women or the elderly aboard. Apart from that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
might


Possible spelling mistake. ‘overgeneralise’ is British English.
overgeneralise
the role of factors which have contributed to a former generation’s

condition, be it inherited wealth or even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
luck, to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
and disregard the

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
value
of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
, efforts and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
status.

In conclusion
, I am not sure if the growing trend towards researching one’s

ancestors and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
line is actually helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and the society
in general
, and

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
believe
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be discouraged
.

IELTS essay In some parts of the world it is becoming popular to research the history of one's own family Why might people want to do this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
23 paragraphs
287 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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