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In some countries, the rate of crimes committed by teenager is increasing. What are the reasons and what can be done to relieve the problem? v.1

In some countries, the rate of crimes committed by teenager is increasing. What are the reasons and what can be done to relieve the problem? v. 1
In recent years, the growth of juvenile crimes has become a pressing issue. This essay will deeply explore this complicated phenomenon from diverse perspectives, identify the relevant contributing factors and bring up feasible solutions. For a start, there is an array of integrated facts contributing to this complicated phenomenon. That teens committing crimes relate to the development of science and technology is undeniable. Take the establishment of social media platforms, for instance, where millennials utilize these platforms to communicate with strangers. Unbeknownst to them, the people that they exchange information with may be the ones violating the law, leading the youngsters down a dark path. Moreover, it is the weakening of the education system and the loss of the morality portion in the curriculum. Without it, the pupils are unaware of the difference between wisdom and evil, with a worrying number opting to walk the latter’s path. Confronted with such a thorny issue, citizens and educators come up with a variety of viable countermeasures. An initial concrete step is to limit usage of the internet, cutting down a majority of uncertainty in good or evil. To illustrate, a glance at a world without fresh technology involves a troubling time for crimes committed to approach docile teens and corrupt their mind. Furthermore, an intensive study plan should be encouraged, burning time of the teens for positive purposes. It is of paramount importance to shift the focus of corrupted teens and nudge them towards a successful path. In conclusion, when the teenagers are fully aware of the severity of their actions, it is usually too late to turn back, which is why parents and teachers should make concerted efforts to mitigate the issue. It is high time that statistics for laws broken by the new generation be reduced.
In recent years, the growth of juvenile crimes has become a pressing issue. This essay will
deeply
explore this complicated phenomenon from diverse perspectives, identify the relevant contributing factors and bring up feasible solutions.

For a
start
, there is an array of integrated facts contributing to this complicated phenomenon. That
teens
committing crimes relate to the development of science and technology is undeniable. Take the establishment of social media platforms,
for instance
, where millennials utilize these platforms to communicate with strangers. Unbeknownst to them, the
people
that they exchange information with may be the ones violating the law, leading the youngsters down a dark path.
Moreover
, it is the weakening of the education system and the loss of the morality portion in the curriculum. Without it, the pupils are unaware of the difference between wisdom and evil, with a worrying number opting to walk the latter’s path.

Confronted with such a thorny issue, citizens and educators
come
up with a variety of viable countermeasures. An initial concrete step is to limit usage of the internet, cutting down a majority of uncertainty in
good
or evil. To illustrate, a glance at a world without fresh technology involves a troubling time for crimes committed to approach docile
teens
and corrupt their mind.
Furthermore
, an intensive study plan should
be encouraged
, burning time of the
teens
for
positive
purposes. It is of paramount importance to shift the focus of corrupted
teens
and nudge them towards a successful path.

In conclusion
, when the
teenagers
are
fully
aware of the severity of their actions, it is
usually
too late to turn back, which is why parents and teachers should
make
concerted efforts to mitigate the issue. It is high time that statistics for laws broken by the new generation be
reduced
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries, the rate of crimes committed by teenager is increasing. What are the reasons and what can be done to relieve the problem? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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