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Some people think that family life and parents have great influence on children’s development, while others consider that external influence plays a more important role in children’s life. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.3

Some people think that family life and parents have great influence on children’s development, while others consider that external influence plays a more important role in children’s life. v. 3
Nowadays, few individuals argue that spending time with the family have an excellent impact on kid's growth and few experts believe that outside exposure plays a vital influence in children's life. In this essay I would like to view both the sides and give my opinion at the end. To Begin with, children who spend most of the time with their families always build an ideal bond with their parents. Moreover, they learn several qualities like politeness, positivity, patience, respectability and many more. For instance, if mom and dad are helping each other in a kitchen, they will undoubtedly learn that excellent behaviour of helping others. However, if their parents are fighting, then infants will definitely grab that behaviour from them. It is true that toddlers are like a wax statue and it's in their family's hands to mould in a positive or a negative side by creating that aura at home. On the other side, people think sending kids to school or outdoor activities helps them to grow faster and there is no doubt about this opinion. For instance, if a kid is going to school in his early age will help him to grow faster and learn new skills to deal with the outside world. Moreover, games certainly useful for overall growth and health. To conclude, in my opinion, I believe there should be a certain age to send kids to school and for outdoor activities to maintain the balance between family fun and social interaction outside the house. Because I am convinced that both the aspects okay equal roles in children's life
Nowadays, few individuals argue that spending time with the family have an excellent impact on kid's growth and few experts believe that outside exposure plays a vital influence in children's life. In this essay I would like to view both the sides and give my opinion at the
end
.

To
Begin
with, children who spend most of the time with their families always build an ideal bond with their parents.
Moreover
, they learn several qualities like politeness, positivity, patience, respectability and
many
more.
For instance
, if mom and dad are helping each other in a kitchen, they will
undoubtedly
learn that excellent
behaviour
of helping others.
However
, if their parents are fighting, then infants will definitely grab that
behaviour
from them. It is true that toddlers are like a wax statue and it's in their family's hands to
mould
in a
positive
or a
negative
side by creating that aura at home.

On the other side,
people
think
sending kids to school or outdoor activities
helps
them to grow faster and there is no doubt about this opinion.
For instance
, if a kid is going to school in his early age will
help
him to grow faster and learn new
skills
to deal with the outside world.
Moreover
, games
certainly
useful for
overall
growth and health.

To conclude
, in my opinion, I believe there should be a certain age to
send
kids to school and for outdoor activities to maintain the balance between family fun and social interaction outside the
house
.
Because
I
am convinced
that both the aspects okay equal roles in children's
life
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that family life and parents have great influence on children’s development, while others consider that external influence plays a more important role in children’s life. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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