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In some countries, prisoners are allowed comfortable accommodation, good food, and healthcare. Do you think this is appropriate? To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your position. v.1

In some countries, prisoners are allowed comfortable accommodation, good food, and healthcare. Do you think this is appropriate? Give specific reasons and examples to support your position. v. 1
There are various design approaches to prisons and prisoners’ reformation program. Some countries continued the old-fashioned method of providing the bare-minimum facilities that is sometimes borderline inhumane, whereas others offered easier access to comfortable infrastructure. I agree that it is appropriate to provide comfortable facilities in prisons because these are rudimentary human rights and that general comfort are necessary to reform the prisoners. The question revolving comfort in prisons is a result of stigma against the prisoners themselves. These convicts are often stereotyped as lesser human beings due to the crime they committed. Everyone makes mistakes and therefore deserve forgiveness and atonement. Similarly, having a basic level of comfort is every human being’s right, regardless if he or she was an offender or not. Stripping criminals away from their basic access to accommodation, good food and healthcare is simply inhumane. Furthermore, the argument of comfortable jails also stems from the misconception of a prison merely as containment for offenders instead of a rehabilitation centre. The prison is a second chance for prisoners to turn over a new leaf. Thus, psychologically speaking, a suitable environment should be designed to facilitate with reforming the convicts’ habits. To illustrate, research has shown that prisoners whose well-being is looked after while serving their sentence are less likely to succumb into crime upon release. To conclude, I strongly agree that prisoners are allowed to access comfortable facilities in jails, primarily because they are also human beings that deserve basic human rights and the second chance to contribute to the society.
There are various design approaches to
prisons
and
prisoners’
reformation program.
Some
countries continued the
old
-fashioned method of providing the bare-minimum facilities
that is
sometimes
borderline inhumane, whereas others offered easier access to
comfortable
infrastructure. I
agree
that it is appropriate to provide
comfortable
facilities in
prisons
because
these are rudimentary
human
rights and that general comfort are necessary to reform the prisoners.

The question revolving comfort in
prisons
is a result of stigma against the
prisoners
themselves. These convicts are
often
stereotyped as lesser
human
beings due to the crime they committed. Everyone
makes
mistakes and
therefore
deserve forgiveness and atonement.
Similarly
, having a basic level of comfort is every
human
being’s right, regardless if he or she was an offender or not. Stripping criminals away from their basic access to accommodation,
good
food and healthcare is
simply
inhumane.

Furthermore
, the argument of
comfortable
jails
also
stems from the misconception of a
prison
merely
as containment for offenders
instead
of a rehabilitation
centre
. The
prison
is a second chance for
prisoners
to turn over a new leaf.
Thus
,
psychologically
speaking, a suitable environment should
be designed
to facilitate with reforming the convicts’ habits. To illustrate, research has shown that
prisoners
whose well-being
is looked
after while serving their sentence are less likely to succumb into crime upon release.

To conclude
, I
strongly
agree
that
prisoners
are
allowed
to access
comfortable
facilities in jails,
primarily
because
they are
also
human
beings that deserve basic
human
rights and the second chance to contribute to the society.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
With languages, you are at home anywhere.
Edward De Waal

IELTS essay In some countries, prisoners are allowed comfortable accommodation, good food, and healthcare. Do you think this is appropriate? Give specific reasons and examples to support your position. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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