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In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this a positive or negative situation?

In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this a positive or negative situation? mMq8
Selecting place to live is most vital decision in humans life. In some some part of world, having own premises is most significant because it is senses of achievement than renting which could not save money. It has a many positive outcomes as house ownership is natural human desire. To commence with, After having everything in life a person want to live in his own house. At the same time, it gave many benefits also. Firstly, Individual have freedom at his/her home and can freely live life. In addition, in personal house people con renovate it and make changes according to their choices after several years. Due to this, they get Superior respect by their near ones or neighbour as well as they acquire great status and impression in Society too. Furthermore, a person can feel Satisfied and relaxed in private residence. Moreover, they also experience Sense of fulfillment. For instance When an individual Obtain an appropriate Job and earn sufficient money then he Started planning to his dream house in this way one can fulfill it. Thus, human kind also feel sense of Security at personal accommodation. However, it to also reduce the burden of paying monthly rentals that imposes additional stress on families that depends on renting houses. In conclusion, due of Safety & stability concern people tends to have their private assets instead of renting. By this way it is a positive development in favor of many people
Selecting place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
is
Did you mean "the most"?
most
vital decision in humans life. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
part of world,

having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
premises is most significant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is senses of achievement than

renting which could not save money. It has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
outcomes as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
ownership is natural human desire.

To commence with, After having everything in life a person want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
. At the same time, it gave
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits
also
.
Firstly
, Individual have freedom at his/her home and can
freely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
life.
In addition
, in personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
con renovate it and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
according to their choices after several years. Due to this, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Superior respect by their near ones or
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbour' is British English.
neighbour
as well
as they acquire

great status and impression in Society too.

Furthermore
, a person can feel Satisfied and relaxed in private residence.
Moreover
,

they
also
experience Sense of fulfillment.
For instance
When an individual Obtain

an appropriate Job and earn sufficient money then he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Started
planning to his dream
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
in this way one can fulfill it.
Thus
, human kind
also
feel sense of Security at personal accommodation.
However
, it to
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the burden of paying monthly rentals that imposes additional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
on families that depends on renting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
.

In conclusion
, due of Safety & stability concern
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
tends
to have their private assets
instead
of renting. By this way it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development in favor of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
people
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IELTS essay In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this a positive or negative situation?

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
240 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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