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Some people argue that immigrants should adopt the local culture when immigrating to a new country. An alternative view is that they can adapt to a new environment by establishing a minority community. Discuss these both two views and give your opinion

Some people argue that immigrants should adopt the local culture when immigrating to a new country. An alternative view is that they can adapt to a new environment by establishing a minority community. Discuss these both two views and give your opinion pWrm
Nowadays, people is choosing to migrate another country for various purposes. Some believe that people who migrant in another country, continue to live in thier local culture while others argue that they have to establish new culture for their comfort. In this essay i will discuss both the points amd latter give my viewpoint. On the one hand, migrants who accepted to learn new culture according to environment has lots of benefits. Every country known for thier typical culture. To accepting new culture, they have a better chance to communicate with local public, it is also beneficial for them to grow very quickly. If migrant has ability to fought out with language barrier then it gives tremendous opportunities to live comfort life. On the other hand, every person has their own identity. Every migrant who follows their local culture on other country can get some attention to local public towards their own traditional culture. For example, In Canada, 20 years ago, numerous Indians migrant to earn well or study and most of them living with thier own culture; today, we can see many indian restaurant and festival which are celebrated in Canada in sama way as India. Thus, it is long-time process. In My opine, both the point has equal benifit. Pupil has to adapt culture on circumstances. Furthermore, local culture is identity for everyone and to communicate with others we have to learn new culture to live in comfort zone.
Nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
choosing to migrate another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
for various purposes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
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migrant
in another
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country
, continue to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
while others argue that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
establish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
for their comfort. In this essay
Did you mean "I"?
i
will discuss both the points
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amd
latter give my viewpoint. On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
migrants
who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
to learn
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new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
according to environment has lots of benefits. Every
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country
known for
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
typical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. To accepting
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new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, they have a better chance to communicate with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
public, it is
also
beneficial for them to grow
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
. If
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migrant
has ability to fought out with language barrier then it gives tremendous opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
comfort life. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, every person has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
identity. Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
migrant
who follows their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
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country
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
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some
attention to
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local
public towards their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
For example
, In Canada, 20 years ago, numerous Indians
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
migrant
to earn well or study and most of them living with
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
;
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today
, we can
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see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
indian
restaurant and festival which
are celebrated
in Canada in
Possible spelling mistake found.
sama
way as India.
Thus
, it is long-time process. In My opine, both the point has equal
Possible spelling mistake found.
benifit
. Pupil
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
adapt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
on circumstances.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is identity for everyone and to communicate with others we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in comfort zone.
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IELTS essay Some people argue that immigrants should adopt the local culture when immigrating to a new country. An alternative view is that they can adapt to a new environment by establishing a minority community. Discuss these both two views and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
241 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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