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In some countries, many people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v.2

In some countries, many people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v. 2
In this day and age, the trend of living alone has increased significantly as compared to the past decades. As far as I am concerned, the trend could have both positive and negative development in this statement. The positive of living alone is relatively obvious. One such benefit is that individuals can become more independent. Without any financial assistances from family, individuals will need to learn and proceed everything by themselves, such as cooking, cleaning, time management, and paying the utilities, all of which are valuable life skills. Secondly, from an economic perspective, a growing number of people prefer to live by themselves will result in an increase demand for housing. This definitely encourages construction industries to build more houses and apartments to satisfy the need of people. However, there are opposing voices saying this trend is a negative development. First and foremost, individuals will tend to alienate with family. As living in this competitive society, young people have to work harder to support their lives and goal achievements. Consequently, the communication and interaction will be reduced with family. Secondly, and most obviously, from the financial point of view, a rise in demand of housing is likely to push up the price of the rent and properties. While this may benefit for some business, a number of residents, including those who live alone, burden will be increased. In conclusion, while there are two distinctive spectrums to both positives and negatives development, but the positives clearly outweigh the negatives based on the article above. Therefore, I strongly believe that live alone is more instrumental
In this day and age, the trend of living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
has increased
significantly
as compared to the past decades. As far as I
am concerned
, the trend could have both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
development in this statement.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
of living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
is
relatively
obvious. One such benefit is that individuals can become more independent. Without any financial
Possible spelling mistake found.
assistances
from family, individuals will need to learn and proceed everything by themselves, such as cooking, cleaning, time management, and paying the utilities, all of which are valuable life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
Secondly
, from an economic perspective, a growing number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
by themselves will result in an increase demand for housing. This definitely encourages construction industries to build more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and apartments to satisfy the need of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

However
, there are opposing voices saying this trend is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
development.
First
and foremost, individuals will tend to alienate with family. As living in this competitive society, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work harder to support their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
and goal achievements.
Consequently
, the communication and interaction will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
with family.
Secondly
, and most
obviously
, from the financial point of view, a rise in demand of housing is likely to push up the price of the rent and properties. While this may benefit for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
business, a number of residents, including those who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
, burden will
be increased
.

In conclusion
, while there are two distinctive
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "spectra", the plural form of the noun 'spectrum'?
spectrums
to both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positives
and negatives development,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positives
clearly
outweigh the negatives based on the article above.
Therefore
, I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
is more instrumental
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries, many people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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