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In some countries it is compulsory to learn another language at school.

In some countries it is compulsory to learn another language at school. PMd8w
Although it is believe by some countries that, in school time children must learn another language, other nations thinks that, offsprings can learn any subject whatever they want. I am quite incline with the opinion that another language plays vital role not only in education but also enhance theri knowledge about different nations; however another subject will help to find jobs. Out of all agrument, the strongest one to prove my view is that, learning any new language in childhood is easier then any age. First of all, the starting year of the life of children are more crucial for theri brain development as well as high learning capacity. In other words, children can take less time and less effort to learn any new language. Secondly, with the help of other language people can access another culture and tradition easily. For example, in the Japan most of the schools teaches different language instead of another subject. On the other hand, each and every students have some special talent and unique skills. In some country, students can choose any subject, which they like and it is helpfull for the future requirement. In addition, another subject imporve in depth knowledge and information. Despite of competation era, students can get job easily in that field. For example, in my country millions of students choose another subject that they likes. To conclude, this essay acknowledged that with the help of another language people access different culture however different subject can help to find job easily. In my opinion another language is more cricial out of both.
Although it is
Consider using a past participle here: "believed".
believe
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries that, in school time children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
learn another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
nations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
that,
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings can
learn any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
whatever they want. I am quite
Consider using a past participle here: "inclined".
incline
with the opinion that another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
plays vital role not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
enhance
Possible spelling mistake found.
theri
knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
nations;
however
another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to find jobs.

Out of all
Possible spelling mistake found.
agrument
, the strongest one to prove my view is that, learning any new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in childhood is
Did you mean "easier than"?
easier then
any age.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the starting year of the life of children are more crucial for
Possible spelling mistake found.
theri
brain development
as well
as high learning capacity. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, children can take less time and less effort to learn any new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
.
Secondly
, with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can access another culture and tradition
easily
.
For example
, in the Japan most of the schools teaches
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
instead
of another subject.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, each and every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "student"?
students
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
special talent and unique
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
country,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can choose any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, which they like and it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
helpfull
for the future requirement.
In addition
, another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
Possible spelling mistake found.
imporve
in depth knowledge and information.
Did you mean "Despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
Despite of
Possible spelling mistake found.
competation
era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
job
easily
in that field.
For example
, in my country millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
choose another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
that they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "like"
likes
.

To conclude
, this essay acknowledged that with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
access
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
culture
however
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to find job
easily
. In my opinion another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is more
Possible spelling mistake found.
cricial
out of both.
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IELTS essay In some countries it is compulsory to learn another language at school.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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