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In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In some nations, there are more and more people who became vegetarian. While a plant-based diet is not rich in beneficial nutrients, this type of diet offers a healthier lifestyle. In my opinion, the benefits of being vegetarian outweigh the drawbacks. People who consume just fruits and vegetables in their diet, do not get the needed nutrients that a body requires. That is to say that meat, eggs and milk are full of healthy protein and vitamins which a body needs, therefore, if people follow a plant based diet, they will not get these required nutrients. Even if some vegetarian products contain protein, they do not have the same value and quality as proteins in meat and eggs. For example, a report conducted by WHO revealed that 85% of vegetarian people suffer from a lack of vitamins. However, I believe that it is better to have a healthier life by being vegetarian and nutrients issues could be solved by taking vitamin tablets. The benefits of following a vegetarian diet are that people will have a healthier body. This is because most of the meals that vegetarian people consume are low in harmful fats which are the main cause of many diseases such as heart diseases, obesity and diabetes. For instance, a recent survey has shown that 90% of vegetarian people are less prone to have cardiovascular issues. Moreover, nowadays, the majority of meat and eggs are combined with hormones and other unhealthy substances in order to enhance their quality, which has a negative impact on the human`s body, thus, avoiding eating meat is better for people`s health. I believe that having better health by following a plant-based diet is more beneficial than following a meat-based diet. In conclusion, although a vegetarian diet might be poor in vitamins and nutrients, a healthy body and lifestyle is more important because nutrients issues could be solved by tablets.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
nations, there are more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who became vegetarian. While a plant-based diet is not rich in beneficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nutrients
, this type of diet offers a healthier lifestyle. In my opinion, the benefits of being vegetarian outweigh the drawbacks.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who consume
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
fruits and vegetables in their diet, do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the needed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nutrients
that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
requires.
That is
to say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
, eggs and milk are full of healthy protein and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vitamins
which a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
needs,
therefore
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
follow a plant based diet, they will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
these required
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nutrients
. Even if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
vegetarian products contain protein, they do not have the same value and quality as proteins in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
and eggs.
For example
, a report conducted by WHO revealed that 85% of vegetarian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suffer from a lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vitamins
.
However
, I believe that it is better to have a healthier life by being vegetarian and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nutrients
issues could
be solved
by taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vitamin
tablets.

The benefits of following a vegetarian diet are that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will have a healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
most of the meals that vegetarian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consume are low in harmful fats which are the main cause of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
diseases such as heart diseases, obesity and diabetes.
For instance
, a recent survey has shown that 90% of vegetarian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are less prone to have cardiovascular issues.
Moreover
, nowadays, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
and eggs
are combined
with hormones and other unhealthy substances in order to enhance their quality, which has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the
The character between 'human' and 's' is an accent character, not a standard apostrophe character. Use "human’s" (curly apostrophe) or "human's" (straight apostrophe).
human`s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
,
thus
, avoiding eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
is better for
The character between 'people' and 's' is an accent character, not a standard apostrophe character. Use "people’s" (curly apostrophe) or "people's" (straight apostrophe).
people`s
health. I believe that having better health by following a plant-based diet is more beneficial than following a meat-based diet.

In conclusion
, although a vegetarian diet might be poor in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vitamins
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nutrients
, a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
and lifestyle is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nutrients
issues could
be solved
by tablets.
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IELTS essay In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
315 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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