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In some countries, children have very strict rule of behavior, while in other countries they are allowed to do anything they want. to what extent children have to follow rules? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples. v.1

In some countries, children have very strict rule of behavior, while in other countries they are allowed to do anything they want. v. 1
It is often argued that the young ones should be made to follow strict rules of conduct, while others argue that they should be granted the freedom to express themselves freely and not follow any guidelines. First, This essay will discuss that children reared under the strict rule of conduct are more stable and enjoy a healthy relationship with their parents. Second, it will discuss how children who are allowed the freedom from rules live to be more emotionally independent and happy individuals. There are numerous reasons why children should stick to well-defined rules of conduct, but the most important one stems from the fact that the rules of behaviour teach them the value of respect for their parents. Rules make for a much stable and measured individual as they know how to react to everyday situations, which might make them angry or excited. Hence, they are more likely to have an intense relationship with their parents as they expect respect from their children. For example, a study with pre-teens found out that an overwhelming majority of them agreed that they were much closer to their parents because they had strict rules of conduct enforced in their homes. Nevertheless, some people adopt an opposing view and believe that freedom of behaviour is significantly vital for the individual emotional expression and freedom of the pre-teens. Having a set of rule dictate your response to everyday life curbs the ability of younguns to learn from previous experiences. When children learn how to deal with their emotions, they feel they are in control. It is imperative that children have freedom when it comes to expressing their range of behaviours, especially their right to express anger, happiness. As children learn how to deal with their problems and emotional reactions to them, they are much happier and emotionally independent. For instance, a study conducted in the university of Delhi found out that a majority of people agreed that they were much happier when they had the freedom to express themselves freely at home during their childhood. In conclusion, While strict adherence to rule makes for significantly more stable individuals with a stable relationship, kids who had a higher degree of freedom when it came to their behaviour enjoyed a happier life and elevated levels of emotional dependency. Thus, kids should be reared in an environment where the children can full control of their behaviour rather than following guidelines
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that the young ones should
be made
to follow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conduct
, while others argue that they should
be granted
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to express themselves
freely
and not follow any guidelines.
First
, This essay will discuss that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
reared under the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rule
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conduct
are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stable
and enjoy a healthy relationship with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. Second, it will discuss how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
to be more
emotionally
independent and happy individuals.

There are numerous reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should stick to well-defined
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conduct
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
one stems from the fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
of
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
teach them the value of respect for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Rules
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stable
and measured individual as they know how to react to everyday situations, which might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them angry or excited.
Hence
, they are more likely to have an intense relationship with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
respect from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
For example
, a study with
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-teens
found out that an overwhelming majority of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that they were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
closer to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they had
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conduct
enforced in their homes.

Nevertheless
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
adopt an opposing view and believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
of
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
is
significantly
vital for the individual emotional expression and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-teens
. Having a set of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rule
dictate your response to everyday life curbs the ability of
Possible spelling mistake found.
younguns
to learn from previous experiences. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
learn how to deal with their emotions, they feel they are in control. It is imperative that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to expressing their range of
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
,
especially
their right to express anger, happiness. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
learn how to deal with their problems and emotional reactions to them, they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
happier and
emotionally
independent.
For instance
, a study conducted in the university of Delhi found out that a majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that they were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
happier when they had the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to express themselves
freely
at home during their childhood.

In conclusion
, While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strict
adherence to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rule
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
for
significantly
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stable
individuals with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stable
relationship, kids who had a higher degree of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
when it came to their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
enjoyed a happier life and elevated levels of emotional dependency.
Thus
, kids should
be reared
in an environment where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can full control of their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
rather
than following guidelines
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries, children have very strict rule of behavior, while in other countries they are allowed to do anything they want. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
402 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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