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In some countries an increasing number of people who are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extend do you agree or disagree v.2

In some countries an increasing number of people who are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. v. 2
Nowadays, Eating food is an entertainment to many people because they enjoy to eat. In few nations health issues are increasing due to over eating of junk food. Hence administration have to take seviour action on this variety of food. I believe that government should made restrictions in order to control the less quality food. However, even if goverment take the actions, people also have to take measures On one hand, because of eating junk food, most of the people are suffered. In order to decrease this proportion, administration must come forward to take sevior actions such as high taxexes. For instance packets like kurkure are harmful to eat is that to prevent it, Modi government took action against it and banned the product. In addition, the food in fast food centers are low quality, which has no any vitamins. Low quality food is the main reason to lead the disease across the country as it contains the vulnarable jerms. Although people bilieve that it doesn' t contain any harm to people, it is the main reason. To illustrate, In 201 survey 80% of deseases are caused because of less quality food in the fast food centers. Hence administration need to take the action on fast food On the other hand, Even if government take the action, it doesn' t work completly because the people have to take some measures. Firstly, inhabitants must avoid the junk items to eat. If they avoid by themself, it will be 100% succes rather than the official action on the fast food. For example after inhabitants had known the fact that chinese products were low quality products, many people didn' t want to buy those products as a result the chinese products declined over the period. Therefore self action is necessary to prevent the quality less food in order to decrease the diseases In conclucion, I believe that the government must take an action where as people also an initiative to tackle the junk food to prevent diseases. Government should make a law on junk food because it stops the less quality food. However individuals have to take as their responsibility in order to eradicate the diseses
Nowadays, Eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is an entertainment to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
The verb 'enjoy' is used with the gerund form: "enjoy eating".
enjoy to eat
. In few nations health issues are increasing due to over eating of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
administration
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take
Possible spelling mistake found.
seviour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
on this variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: "make"
made
restrictions in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
However
, even if
Possible spelling mistake found.
goverment
take the actions,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take measures

On one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are suffered
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to decrease this proportion, administration
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to take
Possible spelling mistake found.
sevior
actions such as high
Possible spelling mistake found.
taxexes
.
For instance
packets like
Possible spelling mistake found.
kurkure
are harmful to eat is that to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
it,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Modi
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
took
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
against it and banned the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
centers are low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
, which has
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
any vitamins. Low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is the main reason to lead the disease across the country as it contains the
Possible spelling mistake found.
vulnarable
Possible spelling mistake found.
jerms
. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
bilieve
that it
Possible spelling mistake found.
doesn&
#039; t contain any harm to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, it is the main reason. To illustrate, In 201 survey 80% of
Possible spelling mistake found.
deseases
are caused
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
centers.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
administration need to take the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
food


On the other hand
, Even if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
take the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
, it
Possible spelling mistake found.
doesn&
#039; t work
Possible spelling mistake found.
completly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measures.
Firstly
, inhabitants
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
avoid the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
items to eat. If they avoid by
The term is non-standard and not widely accepted.
themself
, it will be 100%
Possible spelling mistake found.
succes
rather
than the official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
For example
after inhabitants had known the fact that
Possible spelling mistake found.
chinese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
were low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
didn&
#039; t want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
as a result
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
chinese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
declined over the period.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
self
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to decrease the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
diseases


In
Possible spelling mistake found.
conclucion
, I believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
Did you mean "whereas"?
where as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
an initiative to tackle the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
diseases.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a law on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stops
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take as their responsibility in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to eradicate the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
diseses
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
64Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay In some countries an increasing number of people who are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
362 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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