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In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problem as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefor necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problem as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefor necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. with this opinion? rglL
Nowadays, tons of people prefer to eat junk food rather than home made food all around the world which results in health problems in those junk food obsessed people. It is believe that government should impose high tax rates on such food. However, I partially agree with the statement and reasons behind my inclination are articulated in trailed paragraph. To begin with, not only off springs but adults also opted for fast food owing to this several health related issues are mainly observed among them. Some masurements should be taken to make people aware about their health as well as make them to eat healthy. One of them is to impose high tax rates on fast lood so it can not be afford by everyone. Mainly, the youngster prefer to eat processed food consequently the one who does not earn, could not manage to eat much from his pocket money. For instance, a fast food outlet called starbucks in country namely India charge more than its normal rates as more tax has been imposed by the government body. Moreover, they should be motivated to eat healthy as well as to do yoga to cope with some health issues as it keeps a person fit inside out. Apart from this, higher tax on eatables can result but in riots by the civilians consequently food is basic necessity of every individul. Moreover, government can organise some marathons or camps which can be truitfull for people to lose weight or can help them to make a diet plan and follow it. In addition, cooking show containing healthy recipes should be telecast by the government to influence people. To conclude, it is individual's responsibility to eat under control and take proper care of the health. Otherwise, government have to take step to control the raising number of health issues owing to eating fast food.
Nowadays, tons of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
rather
than home made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
all around the world which results in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems in those junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
obsessed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. It is
Consider using a past participle here: "believed".
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should impose high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
rates on such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
However
, I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement and reasons behind my inclination
are articulated
in trailed paragraph.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
off springs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
adults
also
opted for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
owing to this several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
related issues are
mainly
observed among them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
Possible spelling mistake found.
masurements
should
be taken
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aware about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
healthy. One of them is to impose high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
rates on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
Possible spelling mistake found.
lood
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it can not be
Consider using a past participle here: "afforded".
afford
by everyone.
Mainly
, the youngster prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
consequently
the one who does not earn, could not manage to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
much from his pocket money.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
outlet called
Possible spelling mistake found.
starbucks
in country
namely
India charge more than its normal rates as more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
has
been imposed
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
body.
Moreover
, they should
be motivated
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
healthy
as well
as to do yoga to cope with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
a person fit inside out.

Apart from this, higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
on eatables can result
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in riots by the civilians
consequently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is basic necessity of every
Possible spelling mistake found.
individul
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can
Possible spelling mistake. 'organise' is British English.
organise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
marathons or camps which can be
Possible spelling mistake found.
truitfull
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to lose weight or can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a diet plan and follow it.
In addition
, cooking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
containing healthy recipes should be telecast by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to influence
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To conclude
, it is individual's responsibility to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
under control and take proper care of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
Otherwise
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take step to control the raising number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues owing to eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
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IELTS essay In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problem as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefor necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. with this opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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