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In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.21

In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. v. 21
Different countries practice various economic systems in the world. While some countries like the United States has always been supportive of investors and rich people, others, such as China believe in socialism and strict control of the economy and people's income. I do believe each of these systems has its pros and cons, but I think governments should define some rules and regulations to harness the incomes. Earning unlimited wages is a dream for everyone, and especially can be attractive for big business owners. Such policy can attract a huge amount of investments in one place and boosts the economy and making a lot of job opportunities. For example, Silicon Valley in California hosts thousands of start up companies, which are run by such kind of investments. Moreover, high salaries increase the motivation for young employees, and inspire them to work harder to build their dream world. On the other hand, government regulation and monitoring on wages can be beneficial as well. In my opinion, politicians can decrease the gap between poor and rich. For example, some governments pay subsidies to refugees and vulnerable citizens in order to eradicate the poverty. Such activities cause the society grows uniformly, and in the long-term provide equal opportunities to all citizens. Additionally, the nations who achieved to this stage usually have lower rate of crimes and better quality of health and education system (for example, Sweden, Noway and Finland). In conclusion, while receiving high income is tempting and lead to burgeoning economy, but I argue that governments should adjust the wages in some levels to make a better life for all citizens.
Different
countries practice various economic systems in the world. While
some
countries like the United States has always been supportive of investors and rich
people
, others, such as China believe in socialism and strict control of the economy and
people
's income. I do believe each of these systems has its pros and cons,
but
I
think
governments
should define
some
rules
and regulations to harness the incomes.

Earning unlimited wages is a dream for everyone, and
especially
can be attractive for
big
business owners. Such policy can attract a huge amount of investments in one place and boosts the economy and making
a lot of
job opportunities.
For example
, Silicon Valley in California hosts thousands of
start
up
companies
, which
are run
by such kind of investments.
Moreover
, high salaries increase the motivation for young employees, and inspire them to work harder to build their dream world.

On the other hand
,
government
regulation and monitoring on wages can be beneficial
as well
. In my opinion, politicians can decrease the gap between poor and rich.
For example
,
some
governments
pay subsidies to refugees and vulnerable citizens in order to eradicate the poverty. Such activities cause the society grows
uniformly
, and in the long-term provide equal opportunities to all citizens.
Additionally
, the nations who achieved to this stage
usually
have lower rate of crimes and better quality of health and education system (
for example
, Sweden, Noway and Finland).

In conclusion
, while receiving high income is tempting and lead to burgeoning economy,
but
I argue that
governments
should adjust the wages in
some
levels to
make
a better life for all citizens.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. v. 21

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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