Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In Some Areas Of The US, A Curfew Is Imposed In ... -

In Some Areas Of The US, A Curfew Is Imposed In. . . - 75q62
As we we all know, children are the future pillars of the country. In some areas of United States, a 'curfew' is imposed in which adoloescence are not permitted to got out after a certain time at night unless someone is there to guide them. In my view, it is a good start. Nowadays crime rate has increased so much that it is important to safeguard our children from indulging into bad habits. Firstly, today's youth easily get attracted to whatever they see. So, the basic reason to start the restriction for under eighteen is because mostly the criminals come out after dark. There might be greater chance of attracting to their criminal activities and even they can kidnap the children. Thieves can steal their valuables and can also hurt them. It is necessary to keep our child safe. For instance, according to the survey done in India, there is an increased number of kidnapping cases of children at nocturnal. Moreover, youngsters are very keen of doing new adventures and follow the other people, they doesn't know whether it is good or bad and such youthcan be smoothly get into smuggling, smoking and drinking. Such things can have a bad on their life. Smugglers take their help for transporting the items in their school bags. For example, it is given in 'Times Of India' that the teenagers are mostly use for contraband. In conclusion, the ban that prevents juveniles from going out of home after sunset unless they are accompanied by a guardian is appreciated. As, we can defend our children from criminals and also involving them into bad habits.
As
Possible typo: you repeated a word
we we
all know,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are the future pillars of the country. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
areas
A determiner is probably missing here: "of the United States".
of United States
, a 'curfew'
is imposed
in which
Possible spelling mistake found.
adoloescence
are not permitted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
out after a certain time at night unless someone is there to guide them.

In my view, it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
. Nowadays crime rate has increased
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to safeguard our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
from indulging into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
habits.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's youth
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attracted to whatever they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the basic reason to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
the restriction for under eighteen is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
mostly
the criminals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out after dark. There might be greater chance of attracting to their criminal activities and even they can kidnap the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Thieves can steal their valuables and can
also
hurt them. It is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
our child safe.
For instance
, according to the survey done in India, there is an increased number of kidnapping cases of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
at nocturnal.

Moreover
, youngsters are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
keen of doing new adventures and follow the other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "don't"
doesn't
know whether it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
and such
Possible spelling mistake found.
youthcan
be
smoothly
Consider using a past participle here: "got", "gotten".
get
into smuggling, smoking and drinking. Such things can have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
on their life. Smugglers take their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for transporting the items in their school bags.
For example
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in 'Times Of India' that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
are
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for contraband.

In conclusion
, the ban that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
juveniles from going out of home after sunset unless they
are accompanied
by a guardian
is appreciated
. As, we can defend our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
from criminals and
also
involving them into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
habits.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay In Some Areas Of The US, A Curfew Is Imposed In. . . -

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
270 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts