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In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home? 6bnx
I fully agree with the above statement, teenagers want to spend more time with their friends but not with their parents. One of the reasons behind it can be carefree lifestyle children wanted to adopt nowadays, with no responsibility. In my opinion parents should not force them but make them understand that they should spend quality time with their children, to make good memories. One of the reasons behind, children want to spend more time with their friends because according to them spending time with their parents is just wastage of time. Nowadays, teenagers are involved in different type of activities which require a lot of hard work and passion and they are working hard to achieve their goals. On the other hand, in my opinion parents should not force their children to spend time with them despite of that they should ask their children to take some time off and engage in the activities which are of common interest on the weekends. By this way they can make good memories for the lifetime and can cherish the time in the future. To conclude, parents should not force their parents to spend the time rather make them relise how important to spend a quality time as family which they can look back and cherish each and every moments they have spended.
I
fully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the above statement,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. One of the reasons behind it can be carefree lifestyle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
wanted to adopt nowadays, with no responsibility. In my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should not force them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them understand that they should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
memories.

One of the reasons behind,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
according to them spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
wastage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. Nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
are involved
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
type of activities which require
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
passion and
they are working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to achieve their goals.

On the other hand
, in my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should not force their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with them
Did you mean "despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
despite of
that they should ask their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
off and engage in the activities which are of common interest on the weekends. By this way they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
memories for the lifetime and can cherish the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in the future.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should not force their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
rather
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them
Possible spelling mistake found.
relise
how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
as family which they can look back and cherish each and every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "moment"?
moments
they have
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "spent", the past tense form of the verb 'spend'?
spended
.
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IELTS essay In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
221 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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