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In modern societies, more and more people choose to live on their own? What are the reasons people choose to do this? Is it a positive or negative trend?

In modern societies, more and more people choose to live on their own? What are the reasons people choose to do this? Is it a positive or negative trend? exGp
In this modern era, an increasing number of people are living alone. Many people choose to live on their own because of their age and financial status. When people think that they are old enough and financially independent, they will try to find their own accommodation to live alone. So, they do not have to follow rules made by other people they lived with. But, is it a positive development? I believe that this trend has a lot of drawbacks to be considered as a positive development and the reasons will follow in this essay. Nowadays, the idea of living unaccompanied has become a part of our lifestyles. Many people choose to live alone because they think they already reached the age, which is allowed them to live independently. Other factors that can trigger young adults to live on their own are they have already financially independent as they can support their own needs. Additionally, many young people are not comfortable with rules that made by other people. New graduate students, who enhance their first professional career, for instance, prefer to life unaccompanied because they want to avoid rules made by their parents, like the night-hours or the dress codes. These people do not like to be supervised by their parents because they want to live freely and enjoying life before marriage. Many people think that living alone are good because it can train people to be more independent and more discipline with their life. However, those views are not true. Despite all the positive things that might happen when you live alone, I still believe that this is not a decent thing to be followed. In fact, living alone can cause people to be anti-social and have less empathy to the things that happened around them. Additionally, this development can make youngsters forget the values and the main things about being a part of family members. To conclude, in this modern society, many people choose to live on their own because they want to enjoy free lifestyles as they are already old enough and financially independent. I believe that this not a positive development because young people can be anti-socials and have less empathy for the current situation that happened around them.
In this modern era, an increasing number of
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people
are
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living
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alone
.
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people
choose to
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live
on their
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own
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because
of their age and financial status. When
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people
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think
that they are
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old
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enough
and
financially
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independent
, they will try to find their
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own
accommodation to
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live
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alone
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they do not
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have to
follow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
made by other
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people
they
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lived
with.
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But
, is it a
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positive
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development
? I believe that this trend has
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a lot of
drawbacks to
be considered
as a
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positive
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development
and the reasons will follow in this essay.

Nowadays, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
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living
unaccompanied has become a part of our lifestyles.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they already reached the age, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
independently
. Other factors that can trigger young adults to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
are they have already
financially
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independent
as they can support their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
needs.
Additionally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
young
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people
are not comfortable with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
that made by other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. New graduate students, who enhance their
first
professional career,
for instance
, prefer to life unaccompanied
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want to avoid
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
made by their parents, like the night-hours or the dress codes. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not like to
be supervised
by their parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want to
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live
freely
and enjoying life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
marriage.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
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people
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think
that
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living
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alone
are
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good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can train
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to be more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
independent
and more discipline with their life.
However
, those views are not true. Despite all the
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positive
things that might happen when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
, I
still
believe that this is not a decent thing to
be followed
. In fact,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
can cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to be anti-social and have less empathy to the things that happened around them.
Additionally
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
youngsters forget the values and the main things about being a part of family members.

To conclude
, in this modern society,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want to enjoy free lifestyles as they are already
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
and
financially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
independent
. I believe that this not a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can be anti-socials and have less empathy for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation that happened around them.
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IELTS essay In modern societies, more and more people choose to live on their own? What are the reasons people choose to do this? Is it a positive or negative trend?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
373 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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