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In modern days, when it comes to advertising companies often exaggerate their products are modern or advanced in one way or another.

In modern days, when it comes to advertising companies often exaggerate their products are modern or advanced in one way or another. JVLW5
In modern days, when it comes to advertising companies often exaggerate their products are modern or advanced in one way or another. My opinion is this is both beneficial and negative development because I think companies emphasising products in order to attract customers and to find investors. Firstly, Businesses when they advertise their products, they have to spend a numerous of money which mean their products are useful and also have a certification to be on TV commercial or Social Media commercial. Secondly, the companies products ought to have many improvements than the previous products. In addition, companies emphasise their products to show customer the improvement along with new feature have instal in the new products. Thirdly, Effective advertising would help the companies reach potential customers also could find potential investor and if they are interested in the products they will invest in them. For example, Apple every single year they release brand new products and catch a lot of attention from several people, Apple’s revenue just go up and up every year because of good advertisement. On the other hand, If the companies exaggerate too much their products in advertisement it will lead to bad influence to the companies reputation. More over, when the products do not perfrom like the advertisement would make the companies lost customer or maybe investor would withdraw the money they have invested. Futhermore, some companies their “new” is copying others companies products and announce the new in their products. For instance, a small number of car company copied others designs as a consequence in their advertisement their included that design in their new products To conclusion, I think this is both negative and positive development. In my view emphasize in advertisement is good but do not overuse it.
In modern days, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to advertising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
exaggerate their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are modern or advanced in one way or another. My opinion is this is both beneficial and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
Possible spelling mistake. 'emphasising' is British English.
emphasising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in order to attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
and to find investors.

Firstly
, Businesses when they advertise their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend
The phrase 'a numerous of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'a' and 'of'.
a numerous of
money which mean their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are useful and
also
have a certification to be on TV commercial or Social Media commercial.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
ought to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
improvements than the previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
Possible spelling mistake. 'emphasise' is British English.
emphasise
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
the improvement along with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
feature have
Use past participle here: "installed".
instal
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
Thirdly
, Effective advertising would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
reach potential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
also
could find potential investor and if they
are interested
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
they will invest in them.
For example
, Apple every single year they release brand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and catch
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
attention from several
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, Apple’s revenue
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
go up and up every year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
advertisement.

On the other hand
, If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
exaggerate too much their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
it will lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influence to the
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "companies'" or "company's"?
companies
reputation. More over, when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
do not
Possible spelling mistake found.
perfrom
like the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
lost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
or maybe investor would withdraw the money they have invested.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Futhermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“new”
is copying others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and announce the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
For instance
, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
number of car
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
copied others designs as a consequence in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
their included that design in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
products

To conclusion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this is both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development. In my view
Do not mix variants of the same word ('emphasize' and 'emphasise') within a single text.
emphasize
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
do not overuse it.
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IELTS essay In modern days, when it comes to advertising companies often exaggerate their products are modern or advanced in one way or another.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
294 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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