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In many societies these days, the situation of starving has become increasingly problematic nowadays. Although the agriculture system in the world has been developed, a considerable number of people still cannot receive an ample amount of food. In this essay, I will outline the causes and possible approaches for dealing with this challenge. To a certain extent, financial crisis often contributes to the lack of food supply. As a matter of fact, everyone is under the influence of globalisation but not everyone can benefit from it. For instance, globalisation plays an important role in encouraging trades nationally. Nonetheless, the expenditure of food is unaffordable in some countries. Hence, the occurrence of starvation has become extremely frequent over the last decade. To tackle this obstacle, international organisations such as the United Nations should deliver monetary aid to those countries. Obviously, this act prevents the deterioration of hunger by providing them with enough am

In many societies these days, the situation of starving has become increasingly problematic nowadays. Although the agriculture system in the world has been developed, a considerable number of people still cannot receive an ample amount of food. In this essay, I will outline the causes and possible approaches for dealing with this challenge. To a certain extent, financial crisis often contributes to the lack of food supply. As a matter of fact, everyone is under the influence of globalisation but not everyone can benefit from it. For instance, globalisation plays an important role in encouraging trades nationally. Nonetheless, the expenditure of food is unaffordable in some countries. Hence, the occurrence of starvation has become extremely frequent over the last decade. To tackle this obstacle, international organisations such as the United Nations should deliver monetary aid to those countries. Obviously, this act prevents the deterioration of hunger by providing them with enough am Mo6OQ
In many societies these days, the situation of starving has become increasingly problematic nowadays. Although the agriculture system in the world has been developed, a considerable number of people still cannot receive an ample amount of food. In this essay, I will outline the causes and possible approaches for dealing with this challenge. To a certain extent, financial crisis often contributes to the lack of food supply. As a matter of fact, everyone is under the influence of globalisation but not everyone can benefit from it. For instance, globalisation plays an important role in encouraging trades nationally. Nonetheless, the expenditure of food is unaffordable in some countries. Hence, the occurrence of starvation has become extremely frequent over the last decade. To tackle this obstacle, international organisations such as the United Nations should deliver monetary aid to those countries. Obviously, this act prevents the deterioration of hunger by providing them with enough amount of money. Therefore, low developed countries can purchase food resources and give them to their citizens. While the economies in some part of the world is associated with starving, the uneven distribution of resources could be a reason for hunger. Needless to say, in some contemporary economies, they have a tendency to buy food resources more than their requirement. As a result, countries with low populations may have excessive amount of food resources, whereas the others would not obtain sufficient food. Solving this circumstance involves setting the control of buying and selling of food resources. Taking Paris Agreement as an example, it states that countries can only purchase certain portions of food according to their populations. This is a feasible solution because it ensures countries would purchase food resources under their limits. To conclude, starving in some parts of the world has become challenging in recent years due to economic issue in some countries and overbuying of resources. Provided that countries can afford the price of food resources and they are distributed equally, this challenge could be solved over time.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
societies these days, the situation of starving has become
increasingly
problematic nowadays. Although the agriculture system in the world has
been developed
, a considerable number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
still
cannot receive an ample amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. In this essay, I will outline the causes and possible approaches for dealing with this challenge.

To a certain extent, financial crisis
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
contributes to the lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
supply. As a matter of fact, everyone is under the influence of
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not everyone can benefit from it.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in encouraging trades
nationally
. Nonetheless, the expenditure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is unaffordable in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
Hence
, the occurrence of starvation has become
extremely
frequent over the last decade. To tackle this obstacle, international
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
such as the United Nations should deliver monetary aid to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
Obviously
, this act
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
the deterioration of hunger by providing them with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
amount of money.
Therefore
, low developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
resources and give them to their citizens.

While the economies in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
part of the world
is associated
with starving, the uneven distribution of resources could be a reason for hunger. Needless to say, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
contemporary economies, they have a tendency to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
resources more than their requirement.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
with low populations may have excessive amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
resources, whereas the others would not obtain sufficient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. Solving this circumstance involves setting the control of buying and selling of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
resources. Taking Paris Agreement as an example, it states that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
certain portions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
according to their populations. This is a feasible solution
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it ensures
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
resources under their limits.

To conclude
, starving in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parts of the world has become challenging in recent years due to economic issue in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and overbuying of resources. Provided that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can afford the price of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
resources and
they
are distributed
equally
, this challenge could
be solved
over time.
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IELTS essay In many societies these days, the situation of starving has become increasingly problematic nowadays. Although the agriculture system in the world has been developed, a considerable number of people still cannot receive an ample amount of food. In this essay, I will outline the causes and possible approaches for dealing with this challenge. To a certain extent, financial crisis often contributes to the lack of food supply. As a matter of fact, everyone is under the influence of globalisation but not everyone can benefit from it. For instance, globalisation plays an important role in encouraging trades nationally. Nonetheless, the expenditure of food is unaffordable in some countries. Hence, the occurrence of starvation has become extremely frequent over the last decade. To tackle this obstacle, international organisations such as the United Nations should deliver monetary aid to those countries. Obviously, this act prevents the deterioration of hunger by providing them with enough am

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
332 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • In many societies these days, the situation of starving has become increasingly problematic nowadays. Although the agriculture system in the world has been developed, a considerable number of people still cannot receive an ample amount of food. In this essay, I will outline the causes and possible approaches for dealing with this challenge. To a certain extent, financial crisis often contributes to the lack of food supply. As a matter of fact, everyone is under the influence of globalisation but not everyone can benefit from it. For instance, globalisation plays an important role in encouraging trades nationally. Nonetheless, the expenditure of food is unaffordable in some countries. Hence, the occurrence of starvation has become extremely frequent over the last decade. To tackle this obstacle, international organisations such as the United Nations should deliver monetary aid to those countries. Obviously, this act prevents the deterioration of hunger by providing them with enough am